Play Group Mommy

Breathe

2011-12-02T10:06:00.000-06:00

I am trying to catch my breath and just breathe, but it's hard. There is so much going on in my head right now, that I can't seem to focus on just one thing. We're in the final countdown until surgery day for Kaitlyn, which is this upcoming Tuesday. This week has been crazy for us, well for me mostly. It started out OK on Monday, but quickly became overwhelming on Tuesday, both good and bad ways. First the good, I have some really really great friends, and I feel like I can't say Thank You enough to them for what they did for my family. They are amazing!

The day started going down hill though, my mom had a rash, that kept getting worse, come to find out she had something that had some mushrooms in it, which she is allergic too. Somehow this wasn't on her chart, so they didn't know (GRRR) she was allergic. Thank goodness it isn't a life threatening allergy! They had been trying to treat it, but nothing was helping, so they decided she needed to go to the hospital. She has been there since Tues afternoon and is scheduled to be released today. The good is they changed the meds and the rash seems to be getting better, the bad, her blood pressure has been crazy high (which she has a problem for and is on meds) so they had a heart dr come in as well. They put a monitor on (she has issues with AFIB and in general caused the strokes in March) to keep a check, did an Echo etc, came back fine.

Today she told me last night the monitor went off, because her heart rate kept dropping real low, they had to keep rotating her and making her talk. This part scares me, in fact yesterday the heart dr told her she could have a stroke within a year if her blood pressure doesn't get under control. We already knew this since her stroke was so large and affected so much of her brain, that she is more likely to have another one, she has to many risk factors against her. So this is just something else to make me worry more while we are gone next week.

I am running around like crazy, between the girls basketball practice, team pictures, games and girl scouts, that I can't get anything done, or so it seems. I have a long to do list and haven't crossed anything off yet, since most can't be done until Sunday really (packing etc). I am dreading leaving the big girls, I know they will be fine, but I hate having to do it again. I think Hailey is having a hard time with it, she's acting out a lot more right now, so I am hoping to have some quality time with them (somehow) this weekend before we leave on Monday morning.

I am just praying everything goes well next week for Kaitlyn's surgery, that J & H have a good week and that my mom doesn't have to many issues while I am gone. Since she's been here, I've been to visit just about every day for the last 7 months or so, this is the 1st time she will not have someone come visit for so long, so I am worried. I know my phone will ring like crazy, because she will forget that I am not here to come see her. I really don't need that extra stress, but I don't see a way to avoid it.

So if you're inclined, say a prayer for us and/or send some good thoughts our way, they are very much needed and appreciated.

Happy Thanksgiving

2011-11-24T10:08:00.003-06:00

Happy Thanksgiving from our family to yours!

I have so much to be thankful for these days, it's almost hard to put into words. So bullet points will have to do for today.

*Family - I am thankful for my family; my husband who is my rock, always by my side and believes in me. My children, who remind daily to live in the moment. My mom, who I almost lost this year, reminds me that life can be short, so don't take it for granted. It would take me all day to point out each and every family member, but they are each important to me, each provide love, support & encouragement in their own way.

*Friends- I am thankful for my close friends, even though I don't get to see them often enough these days. I am thankful for new friends I've just met but feel like I've known for quite some time. I have some great friends who have been there through a lot of crazy in my life the last 18 months, so for that I am thankful they are still around.

*Spina Bifida - Yes, a strange one to be thankful for, but if not for the SB, I never would have connected with some great SB mama's and their kiddos in person and online. It's another world, the SB one, but your learn to embrace it, live it, educate about it and change the world. My little K, will change the world one day.

*Doctors/Nurses etc - I am thankful there are wonderful doctors that we've come to know, that will be performing K's surgery on Dec 6th. They take the time to answer our questions, they call back when we have concerns and they truly seem to love kids. Though I dread this upcoming surgery, I am thankful we caught the re-tethering early.

I feel extra blessed these days, even with all the craziness in my life, I've got family & friends by my side and that is enough to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.

Happy Thanksgiving!

3 Weeks, 21 Days, 504 Hours

2011-11-15T08:22:00.002-06:00

Pick one, that's how much time until K's upcoming surgery. Those who don't follow our SB blog, you may not know but K has another de-tethering surgery coming up on Dec 6. I am really not looking forward to this, but know it must be done. I have so much to do between now and then, 3 weeks doesn't seem like enough time. Though some days it seems like it's an eternity.

This week is insanely busy, something every.day of the week, and don't forget Thanksgiving is next week, which I am no where close to ready for. I haven't even started thinking about dinner plans yet, just logistics of getting my mom here for the holiday, so she doesn't have to spend it alone at the nursing home. Of course coming up with the money for the food is another story.

Money, yes that is a hot topic around here on any given day. Things aren't good right now and it doesn't seem like it will get better any time soon. I am unable to work now, since I can't just put K into daycare and with all the other things going on in my life, I can't even fit in an evening job. Sigh. This surgery is a huge unexpected cost we were not expecting which means Christmas will be mighty small this year for the kids unless something miraculous happens.

The downward spiral continues.

Fall & Halloween Fun

2011-11-07T09:36:00.000-06:00

October Whirlwind

2011-11-05T17:11:00.000-05:00

Well October has came and gone and now it's really feeling like Fall. We've done some of the Fall things that were on my list, so we've been busy. So today is our month in pictures :)

Enjoy!

Exhausted!

Cute Pigtails

Observe the Moon Night


Observe the Moon Night

Homecoming Dance Oct 2011

Arrr Matey! Getting ready for HMMT Halloween Carnival


Decorating Pumpkins HMMT Halloween Carnival

Ride Em' Cowgirls

Rollin'

Love Swings

See!?!

Girls favorite thing at Lyons Family Farm


J- October 2011


H - October 2011


K - October 2011

My Pumpkin Patch Loving Girls!

It's Fall Y'All

2011-10-04T13:38:00.000-05:00

It's October! How did that happen? I swear this year is flying by for the most part, but there are days, days like today that make it seem like it's dragging by. October is the time for Fall, and the weather seems to have arrived in Alabama. It was a cold 39 Monday morning when we got up, hello heater! I love fall, the crisp, cool air, the leaves changing colors, the pumpkin patches, Halloween and basically it is the kick off for holiday festivities.

Life is pretty much the same right now, just trying to make it through each day. I did post last time about looking for work, and I've had one of the jobs I applied for contact me, had 2 interviews, and now it's the waiting game to see if I get it. It would be near perfect, M-F, 20 hours, just need decent pay. I don't feel great about how the second interview went, but I was nervous, I can't recall being nervous like I was this time, strange. I hope to hear something today, even if its an email saying they hired someone else, because then I can move on. I am not good at waiting, especially for something like this.

J just finished up her volleyball season, her team came in 4th place in their age group before the tournament, but after it they finished in 3rd. Way to go Purplicious! It's amazing to see how far their team has come since the beginning of practice. They were sooo close to beating the 1st place team, which actually ended up 2nd in the tournament, so they were very happy.

October is also Spina Bifida Awareness month and I hope to help spread the info! I'll be writing a separate post on my SB blog asap, so I will not put tons here. However, I am excited to say I met in person, in the last couple weeks, 3 great SB mamas and their kiddos! It's really nice to have someone to talk to here, locally and get support and advice. Sometimes I still feel alone in this world, but we're slowing getting out there and meeting others. So be sure to check my other blog later today on how you can help prevent Spina Bifida and how to live life even after the diagnosis.

2 Months Later

2011-09-20T20:50:00.001-05:00

I realize right now I suck as a blogger, but you know my life is kinda sucky a lot of days, so it's hard to want to sit down and write anything. The last time I wrote was 2 months ago and my life was on hold, well basically it still is, though I am trying to get unstuck. My mom has made tremendous progress since her stroke at the end of March, she doesn't realize it, but she has. I've put most of my life on hold since then, but I am realizing that I am not making anyone happy by doing that. So I am trying, I can't promise it'll be better tomorrow, the next day or the next, but I am trying. If I continue to let this get me down all the time, I'll self destruct. I am unhappy and I know it, so I want to try to change it. So really this post will be just a random list rather than bore you with all the drama of life.

*I am super stressed these days, so I am trying to get out for a mom night out at least once a week for coffee, if not, then just out by myself, shopping, coffee, something. I need this.

*J & H both love, love their new schools, when this all came about 2 weeks before school started I was unhappy, but now I think it was for the best. J is excelling in her classes, she got all A's on her progress report and couldn't be happier. H loves her teacher and new school and is doing just as well.

*K is growing like a weed (though on the small side for her age) and getting stronger. She does well with her braces and I really think it's improving her leg/ankle strength. I am glad we got her signed up for physical therapy.

*I quit work at the end of Aug, it was to stressful dealing with the crappy manager, working times that just were not working for my family etc. I love the job, hate the boss, if he leaves, I may go back.....but we'll see. So in the meantime I am trying to find something I can do with a flexible schedule, work around my family, after school activities, moms dr appts, K's dr appts and so on. It's kinda hard. I did apply to a couple office type jobs, both part time, but not heard anything yet.

*In light of not working, I am trying to get my crochet stuff in order and work on selling on etsy. I created a store months and months ago but just finally actually listed things. I have someone working on a logo for it to replace the generic I have now. So check it out: http://www.etsy.com/shop/threeprincessdesigns and like me on facebook too! I am in the process of making more items to add soon :)

*The holidays are coming! I am ready for the pumpkin patch, scarecrow trail, Halloween parties, Thanksgiving, Galaxy of Lights & Christmas!

So there you have it, randomness.

Life on Hold

2011-06-20T13:48:00.000-05:00

My life is on hold, I try to make plans but I end up having to cancel. My kids are bored to tears, I am sure this is the worst Summer vacation ever for them. My life revolves around my mom right now. I am more than happy to go see her, I am so glad I am able to see her and that she is alive. It's just so hard on me right now, and my family, her family (the rest of them) isn't here. They are able to go live it up day after day, go out to the club, go hike the wonderful Hawaiian island, go to dinner, sleep well at night, see friends etc. Me? Not a chance. I try to make plans to see friends, and the night before I get a call, she's crying. She wants me to come in the morning. She is having a really really hard time right now and I am the only one who "cares". I get calls all hours of the day and night and it's an inconvience for them when she calls. How you can go without calling/seeing your own mom/wife is beyond me, especially after all of this.

Strokes suck. They take away the person you knew and replace them with someone who may or may not remember you (thankfully she does know who we are) and it damages their brains and body. I can't even imagine going from 100% independent and living alone to having to be in a long term care/nursing home by myself and unable to function by myself. Having to relearn to swallow, chew, drink, eat, speak and even walk in some cases has to be mentally, emotionally and physically exhausting. I know for me it is and I have the easy side of this. However anyone who has been a caregiver knows, this its not so easy either.

Today my phone has rang over 11 times today since 7 am. She called to find out when I was coming, even though she asked me at 10:30 last night. So I tell her, then 10 minutes later she calls and asks again, what time am I coming. The she begins to cry. She hurts, her leg and knee hurts, she wants me to be there now and I can't. Visiting hours do not start until 10, but time makes no difference. The part of the brain that understands time, isn't functioning correctly.

She has come so far since her stroke, but I don't think she truly understands. She almost died, her body had started shutting down. It was a matter of time, the doctors and nurses were telling us it's time for hospice. I mean can you imagine sitting there listening to this but praying they are wrong but deep down you feel it's true? She's in a coma, she suffered another (minor this time) stroke while in the coma and the swelling of her brain was to much. She stayed this way for about a week, and we flew my family over to GA because I wanted them to see her before it was over. Then a miracle happened, I have no doubt in my mind it was a miracle. She went from completely non responsive in over a week to responding on a Thurs morning. She began to open her eyes, squeeze our hands again. What a joyous occasion, since literally the day before my family had to sit down and discuss funeral arrangements, burial, what to do with the house, her things etc.

Our lives were on hold that month she was in the ICU following her stroke. The she started getting better, she started trying to talk more and got more responsive. It truly felt surreal. No one quite understands, because it's easy to say, oh you lost faith. No, we did not. I still prayed she would make it through, but when every doctor that came in to see her, said she was going to die since she did not have the surgery and there was nothing they could do for her you process the information and have to accept what is coming. Unless you've been in this situation, there is no way to understand it, so please don't say something stupid like, well you lost faith.

So yes my life is on hold right now. I never know what each day will bring, as I try to plan and try to be there for her. I need a break like you wouldn't believe, but I have no one to take over. My kids need fun, need to feel like they are still important and they are, but I know they feel left out right now. I am isolated, most people will never, ever understand what I am going through, which means I have no one to talk to who "gets it". Though I truly hope they never have to experience this either.

Life.....on hold

Picture Fun

2011-06-15T15:26:00.000-05:00

Yes it's been awhile since I blogged, no I am not going to get in to why right now. To much on my plate, stress, overwhelming life, isolation etc. I will be back to post about life soon but right now I live it everyday and no need to post about it as well.

This yr we're tightening the purse strings as much as we can with all the crazy we have going on so I needed something for Father's Day for DH. I decided I would do the DAD photos that I see so many doing. Hopefully they turn out OK in print, you just never know.

I couldn't get the munchkin to look at me and hold the letter right, so this will do and I actually think its quite a cute pic. So these pics in a frame will be DH Father's Day present. He wants updated pics of the girls, so I think this will fit the bill nicely.

Oh and yes I made those letters :)

Grr and I just realized I left the time date stamp on the camera when I took them, oh well!

Not Quite A Month

2011-05-06T13:46:00.000-05:00

It's not been quite a month since my last entry, but close. A lot has gone on since my last post, my mom is now in Rehab/LTC (long term care) here in Alabama. She was moved the Monday after Easter. On Easter I got a call from my stepdad that she had passed her swallow test. That was AMAZING news, as just the day before she failed. While it's still a long road to go down, this is so very positive. They are still working on this at the LTC/Rehab place and plan to do a swallow test today and hopefully get her on a diet of food, not liquid food thru the tube as currently. I pray she passes, not only because I want her to regain functions, but because I think it will help her move forward on healing. I know her body has to be weak, it's been over a month since she had a real meal and she's been complaining of headaches nonstop.

I've seen her several times since she has arrived here, some days are good (like Wed) and some are so so, like today. I can tell she's down and depressed. I can understand. She went from having 1 of us there everyday all day with her to me just visiting about every other day. My stepdad and sis came down this past weekend but weren't able to stay long due to the power outage from the tornadoes.

I plan to take all the kids up to see her on Sunday and bring her some gifts. I hope that will raise her spirits some and I hope she's got to eat by then as well. Overall I would say she's doing well on adjusting, I just wish things could go back to what they used to be. I know it can't/won't happen but I can pray.

In other news, we had awful tornadoes come through on April 27 here in Alabama, many many tornadoes. It would take me ALL DAY to find links to show you the devastation but you can go to youtube and search for Alabama tornadoes April 27 and find tons of videos and there's groups and such on facebook with photos. I have friends who lost their houses, friends who have damage to their homes and friends who lost family members. Thankfully and by the grace of God we're all OK as is my house. It's heart breaking seeing the devastation all over Alabama, but one thing is for sure, the people of Alabama have come together as one.

Last but not least, Kaitlyn turns 1 this Sunday. I am feeling quite guilty though because I don't have any thing planned, cake picked out or anything. I know she will never know, but it's 1st birthday and that's important. We have had so much happen in the last month, I just could not find the time to get things done. So I will be working on that tonight and tomorrow and see what I can come up with on Sunday.

So there is my May random update.

Heavy Heart

2011-04-12T08:46:00.000-05:00

My heart is so heavy right now, I feel like I am living in fear. I fear the phone ringing, especially at odd times of the day, such as this morning at 7 am. No one ever calls my house that early, unless something is wrong. My stepdad was calling to tell me my moms heart rate and blood pressure has rocketed back up again. When I left on Sun it was down to normal and she seemed to be doing better. However this morning her heart rate was double and blood pressure back up and she is in pain.

For those who aren't facebook friends or real life friends, short version of what's going on. My mom had a major stroke on March 29, her left side is paralyzed and it pretty much killed off her entire right side of the brain. She was still alert though that Tues and Wed and we thought OK that's a good sign. Little did we know that would be the (currently) last time we would see her that alert. Thurs she started going downhill, and by Friday afternoon she was non responsive and what we know now, basically in a coma. She stayed that way through the following Tues, which the doctors finally did another CT Scan. Come to find out she had another stroke over the weekend, this time on the left side of her brain. Thankfully it wasn't major. When you have a stroke, the brain swells, and pushes against the good part of the brain, thus causing it to lose function as well. She had major swelling on the right side, and slight swelling on the left side. Tuesday the doctors told us that she'd most likely only live a few more days. She was deteriorating rapidly and nothing seemed to be getting better. She spent that entire weekend in AFIB and that is what caused the two strokes.

Wednesday morning it was like someone flipped a switch. She became responsive, opened her eyes, could move her right arm and leg again, she nodded her head she could hear us talking to her etc. It seemed like a miracle was happening right there in front of us. Then that Thurs it was like someone flipped the switch again, and she was back to non responsiveness. Then Fri she came back a little more, and it went on like this for a couple days. Since she was improving, I decided I would go ahead and leave on Sunday and try to get the kids settled back down at home, hubby had already missed 2 weeks of work, so I felt like it was best. It was so hard to leave the hospital though, knowing it could be the last time I could see her "alive", but I am praying it's not.

Fast forward to this morning, the phone call. I was scared to answer it, for fear he was going to tell me my mom had died. Thankfully that isn't what he said, but I am worried today as her heart rate and blood pressure are up. He said she was in AFIB again. I thought the drs had found something that was going to control it, but I guess it's not working so well. The AFIB scares me because that is what caused the strokes, but if her heart doesn't slow down, it keeps going up, it could herniate and ultimately kill her.

I feel like my spirit is broke. I sit and think...I wonder what the last thing my mom ate was. I hope it was something good. I stayed at her house, once hubby and the kids arrived. I thought I would be OK, but I was wrong. Being in it, was fine...but seeing her coffee cup, bowl of sugar and spoon on the counter, set me off. She always sets it out the night before by the stove and her kettle. She had made a grocery list, it was sitting on the counter, waiting. I think I am still in denial that she'll never do these things again....

We are still waiting to see what the next week will bring. If she continues to improve and can sit up etc they will send her to rehab, where they will work with her on relearning things she can't do right now due to the stroke. After 1 week in rehab, they will reevaluate and decide if she can continue. If neither of those things go right, she'll be put into a long term care facility (why they don't say nursing home is beyond me). It kills me though, she did NOT want to be in a home. A 24 hour nurse at home is out of the question, per the doctors. She will require to much care they say... It breaks my heart, she's got no choice, we've tried to honor her wishes, she did now want any surgery (which could have prevent the loss of some of the functions) and if she goes into cardiac arrest, she is DNR/DNI. That part is hard for me to swallow...but we've done what she wanted.

I am still trying to figure out how to get through this...how I can remotely move on in life, when my mom is in ICU, most likely be in a home and is suffering. I wish I was closer than a 7 hour drive, so I could see her more often, so she knows I care. I don't know if she remembers that I came and was there with her, when she was still alert the day after the stroke.

How to process this all, has me at a loss....

Life

2011-03-14T12:54:00.000-05:00

Life sure seems to be full of... well life. I find myself wanting to blog but yet not really having time to. By the time the evening rolls around and the kids are asleep I've got tons of things to catch up on. So this will be a random post for sure.

Since my last post, we've celebrated Hailey's 6th Birthday, Kaitlyn turned 10 months old and summer is coming soon! I am in denial that H is 6 and K will soon be 1. :( I know I say this often but I feel like I missed out on so much the first few months with all the dr appointments, surgery, etc that I can't believe it's almost been a year since she joined the family. I will do a post for birthday pictures etc soon. I'm behind on downloading pictures and taking them :/

I am still working, mostly about 3 days a week, which is just fine. There has been scheduling issues for over a month now but miraculously the last 2 have been right. I know, shocking. Most weeks I haven't been able to get out for a mno due to work, so I was finally off one night this past weekend and got together with some friends for dinner. So glad I did, I really needed that break and as always had a great time. :)

I am also busy trying to plan and keep up with Relay for Life stuff as normal and add the Spina Bifida bowl-a-thon coming up soon, I am spread pretty thin. Kaitlyn returns to UAB on April 18 for her 6 month check in MRI and Renal Ultrasound. I am not looking forward to it at all...she'll be more alert, and aware they are trying to put her to sleep. :( I know it has to be done and it'll become quite normal for her later but it still sucks.

So speaking of Spina Bifida and the bowl-a-thon, I need your help! (you didn't think you were gonna get off easy did you?) :)

My team, Kaitlyn's Kingpins, has to raise at least $125 total, but my personal goal is $100 or more. I've donated $20 myself, and am asking you if you'll help? This is a great cause, and very very dear to me and come on, look at this face and tell me you can resist helping her???

I didn't think so! So go ahead and click on Kaitlyn's Kingpins and make a donation today!!!

Break

2011-02-24T13:15:00.000-06:00

Once again I am behind on blogging, but this is life these days. I used to be really good at time management and for the most part I do get things done but more often than not, I am sometimes late with it. That's not good. So I've been contemplating on how to correct it, I found some great charts that I hope to introduce at home that will help with mundane things such as cleaning etc. Not only for me, but for the kids as well.

I have several deadlines coming up for various things and I'm running out of time. Therefore I've decided to take a facebook break for at least a week, starting tomorrow. I have to work all weekend anyways, I have a craft project I MUST finish by the 2nd (though I am more than halfway done), I have to finish up shopping for H's birthday (mostly done, just need a few items) plus decide on cake/cupcakes and then add in relay for life, meetup and sb bowl-a-thon. Let's just say I need a secretary to help me keep on top of things. So I am hoping that the fb break, will help me. I can spend so much time there, playing stupid games, catching up on my friends lives, looking at pictures, and connecting with old friends. FB has it's pros for sure but of course it is such a time suck though. I just hope the FB break doesn't cause me to spend the time elsewhere online :/ that would defeat the purpose!

I wish I could take a meetup break..but alas that never seems to work out, so I'll just hang low for a bit, attend when I can, though most things now don't interest me as they are for older kids and/or mno are the nights I have to work. So I've not really been doing much there either.

I hope my next blog post is about how I got caught up on so much stuff, well as much as one can with a 9 month old home all the time.

A post of randomness

2011-02-07T20:19:00.000-06:00

It's been awhile since I last blogged. I've wanted to but really just haven't had the time. My poor 365 blog, sadly is neglected as well. I've been taking pictures, but probably not daily and I need to upload them. Maybe this week. Maybe.

I've been working like crazy, 10 out of 12 days, finally had a day off today. The store opened this past Friday and I worked all weekend plus several more days to go this week. I miss my family, I miss seeing friends, I miss relaxing. When I am home, I have been so tired, I've not wanted to do anything but sit around. I was hoping to spend some fun time with the girls this past Sat since I didn't work til the evening, but nope. They were in moods and so was I. I feel guilty for not spending enough time with them.

On Fri hubby and I had a lunch date at Rosie's. YUM, great food and service this time around. We also finished up our taxes, so hopefully our refund will hit the bank in the next week. We will get to pay off these pesky hospital bills. Finally. I also got paid this past Fri, yay for a nice size check, but boo for the long hours.

Kaitlyn turns 9 months old tomorrow...bittersweet. She's pulling up just about everything. We're battling eating right now though. She wants to eat whatever I have, and some stuff I do give her. However she's also starting to barely take her bottles. :/ I am not sure what to do about that right now. I need to start more table foods vs baby foods, but feel lost on what to give her. I don't recall being this way with the other 2 kids....but maybe I just don't remember. Suggestions?

Jessica got selected to be on the year book staff at school. She's super excited about that. Of course it has to be on Thurs afternoons, which is GS day for her. Thankfully she gets done before GS starts. She also is now entering some technology event at the VBC via her S.P.A.C.E class at school. She and a couple girls are building a website, or so I am told.

Hailey, is rambunctious as ever. She's doing well in school, wants to do everything Jess does, but you know how that goes. She is also turning 6 soon. EEK, a little less than a month away. I have got to start planning for her birthday. She is loving Girl Scouts as well and is excited about upcoming camp this Spring.

I am worried about my mom and her health. She's got afib and her Dr recently had her to a heart echo. We're now waiting on results. Her blood pressure is extremely high these days due to lots of stress, which in turn makes the heart issue worse. I hate being so far away, but glad she's not on an island that's an airplane ride away.

I am working on planning a summer vacation for us. I looked at Disney, Universal and even Gatlinburg but we've decided on Stone Mountain, GA instead. They have a lot of neat things to do and it's close enough we can take weekend trips. They have a membership you can get, which as long as you go twice it's more than paid for itself. My mom is going with us and maybe my sister. Plus we're already planning on going this winter coming for their Snow Mountain :)

How is that for randomness?

Wanted: Vacation

2011-01-17T21:23:00.000-06:00

Oh my, today has been a day. K was nonstop fussy, crying, yelling and me all.day. The only time she wasn't, was when she was sleeping, which wasn't much. She woke up at 4 am was up til 7 am, slept til 8 am and then it was downhill from there. The two big kids aggravated me today, they need school. I need school. We all need school. What am I going to do this summer? Oh wait, I know. Summer means nicer weather, can go outside and run them ragged and hope they laze around the rest of the day. Plus then I will get to escape to work, sad when work is an escape? Nah. Well OK maybe a little.

I really really need a vacation. I love my family, I love them I really really do but I need a break. We have had to much togetherness since school ended for winter break in Dec. The kids only went back to school for 4 days after that before snowmaggedon hit. They have been home for 10 days straight now, I've not been anywhere except work and am desperately looking forward to moms night out this weekend. I am glad I am off Sat night so I get to go. That's the downfall to the job lol have to work nights and weekends, but we need the money so we'll make it work.

I am dreaming of sandy beaches, warm sun beating down and nice fruity drinks with umbrellas in them. Ahhh, how nice that would be. I hope I have enough money left after some bills are paid (when we get our taxes) to actually take some kind of trip. I need to start researching and see what I can afford, even if I have to go by myself!

Sigh

2011-01-11T19:41:00.000-06:00

So it's been crazy around here due to our snow, and by snow I mean really a lot of snow for Alabama. We had over 8 inches all across North Alabama. I know, I know my Northern friends this is not a lot in comparison to what you get, however let me point out again, this is Alabama. We (as in the state) are not prepared nor equipped for this type of snow. We have a few snow plows but not enough and when it snows here, it melts and turns into black ice. Black ice is very very dangerous, especially at night as you might imagine. Our city & surrounding counties have been closed down since late Sunday night, today is Tuesday. School has been canceled since Sunday night and is closed at least through tomorrow (Wednesday). It's quite possible it'll be closed or delayed Thursday due to the amount of snow/ice still on the roads.

I mentioned before I got a new job at Jo-Ann fabric & craft stores, had orientation last week and was supposed to start work this week. Actually I was supposed to start last night, but they called at 8 am yesterday morning and said they were not opening due to the weather. OK makes perfect sense to me. They told me to come in tonight at 5 pm. and so even though the city opened some roads today (they were reclosing them at 5) and my local roads still icy I made the trek into work. There were plenty of people there, so I thought OK we'll be working no problem. I go on in and the first shift is leaving and I and only 1 other person show up for the 5 shift. Um OK. They are like oh yeah we're not working tonight. Excuse me? They apparently were able to call every single other person BUT me and this one other guy?? I am pissed, beyond pissed they have such a lack of respect for us. It kills me because the roads were not clear enough to drive on and they did NOT even apologize for not calling.

I really am not sure what to do. I am supposed to work Wed, Fri & Sat this week, however we are still under Winter storm warnings, hard freeze warnings and the news keeps talking about the roads being bad. If they are going to be this way tomorrow, WHY would I drive back to that store? Um I don't think so. The job is not worth possibly getting into a major wreck, getting hurt or killed. No thanks.

So now a few pics from this week

Humor

2011-01-04T12:45:00.000-06:00

Every once in a while my kids will say something funny, so I thought I would share a couple.

Not so long ago, if you'll remember Jessica asked me if Alabama was a state when I was little. Yep that made me feel real good and gave me quite a chuckle.

Last night we had soft tacos for dinner, hubby dropped the last shell on the floor and as he picked it up and shook it off, we were like ummm.. So then Jess says, they are called FLOUR tortillas daddy, not Floor tortillas. Good one Jess, Good one.

And eww he was about to eat it! :$

Then he proceeds to tell me how he's always telling Jess that she can't date etc until she's in her 30's or 40's and her retort was, I want to be able to walk down the aisle, not roll. Um whoa! When did 30 and 40 require a wheelchair? Geesh! I did think it was funny though :)

So there you have it, kids can be funny.

Busy Month Ahead

2011-01-02T15:16:00.001-06:00

I think for most people January should be a time of a slow paced life, as the holidays are over and things are back to normal. Not for me. January is the start of quite a busy time for me. First there is all the mom group stuff at the first of the year, Girl Scout Meetings (weekly between both girls), Girl Scout Cookie sales (hey local moms, don't forget to order yours!), Girl Scout Camp, Relay For Life, now add on my new job that starts this month, I just may lose my mind! This week alone, I have orientation for my job, GS meeting with Jess, Cookie Rally with both girls, & hopefully a MNO on Saturday night. It's going to be a busy week. Thankfully Monday and Tuesday are relatively quiet for me, but the rest of the week will be a blur.

I also got a hair brained idea to make a 365 blog, you know where you take pictures daily and post them. Um yep, we'll see how that goes, as I can't seem to blog here daily. If you wish to visit my 365 blog, you'll have to email me through the contact me, since it's by invite only. I do post pictures here and there of my kids, but since this will be full of pictures I have chosen to keep it private.

I am feeling the need to purge stuff. Our garage is over run with toys, some good and some not, plus outgrown clothes (though we are using them) but it's time to get rid of the baby stuff that K has outgrown. The inside of the house needs to be purged, closets cleaned, clutter gone. I guess the Spring cleaning bug has hit me early. We got all the Christmas stuff down and put up yesterday, I am glad to have my living room back.

I didn't really make any resolutions this year, not yet anyways. I have mulled it over and mostly I am just trying to keep my head above water, so that's it. LOL I do plan to spend more time with the kids, less time online (um we'll see how that goes ;) ) pay down some bills (hence the job) and have some more me time and time alone with hubby. Those aren't to lofty are they?

I have been looking at buying a Kindle, got some extra Christmas money, and they look really cool. Everyone I know that has one, LOVES it. I checked out my moms while visiting this past week, and it is COOL. :) So I have it and a case in my shopping cart on Amazon, just waiting for me to click check out. I am just having a hard time spending that much on myself, mostly because it's just one thing. I am OK buying a couple things here and there, like a skein of yarn etc.but never purchase something over $100 for myself. Still debating.

Well this turned into quite a rambling post, but it covers several topics :) That has to count for something right?

Happy New Year's

2011-01-01T20:02:00.001-06:00

Another year has come and gone and it's hard to believe we're heading into 2011. This past year has been a roller coaster ride for our family. Things started out seemingly well and hit a tailspin in May, it didn't really seem to slow down until mid October. By then the holiday season officially started and boom it's the end of the year.

High Points of 2010

-Family Visits
-Girls Weekend-Nashville
-Successful Relay for Life
-Kaitlyn's Birth
-Girl Scout Camp
-J started 5th Grade
-H started Kindergarten
-Awesome holiday season
-White Christmas

Low Points of 2010

-Kaitlyn's unknown birth defect
-Kaitlyn's major surgery at 6 weeks old
-Constant worry about what our future holds
-Insane amount of hospital & doctor bills

Kaitlyn's diagnosis has opened a whole new world up to us, one that's had many ups and downs. Looking back, I don't think I would change the fact we did not know about the Spina Bifida. We've learned a lot about the SB community and life and I've met some awesome, awesome SB families online and hope to meet many in person one day.

So it really looks like the high points outweigh the low points, but those low points were & are stressful. During all of this though, I've had great supportive family members & friends and they are the ones that helped me/us get through it all.

So from our family to yours, Happy New Year!

I've Been Dreaming of a White Christmas

2011-01-01T17:01:00.000-06:00

For 33 years, I've dreamed of a white Christmas and never did I think I would see one, especially in Alabama! Then again I think the majority of the people in Alabama thought the same thing. It was simply amazing to wake up to a very white Christmas morning, the area had anywhere from 3 to 6 inches of snow. It was breath taking.

I not sure I'll see another white Christmas in my lifetime but it was worth the wait. The snow made the day so much more magical, seeing the kids when they realized there was tons of snow out there, was awesome. They were so happy to be able to go out and play and build a snowgirl. Of course they made snow angels and threw a few snowballs. If we had more appropriate clothing, we would have all enjoyed the snow more and stayed out longer.

Our 1st Snow "girl"

Snow Angel in the making

Don't think she quite understood what to do ;)

We had a very laid back Christmas this year, more so since we stayed home rather than try to go out and visit family. I am very glad, while the roads weren't bad early on, they were later when it iced over. The kids enjoyed all of their presents, Kaitlyn didn't really know what to do or think, but next year should be fun!

A couple days later we headed down to Georgia to visit family and spend a few days there. It was great, the drive there and back went well. The last few times we've gone, something has happened. From the kids being sick, to car issues, but thankfully this time there were none. The visit always go by to fast, but I am glad we went.

All in all I would say that we had an awesome Christmas!

Christmas Pictures

2010-12-31T21:36:00.000-06:00

Picture post for now, will be back later with an in depth post.

Christmas Eve 2010

Putting out the reindeer food


Santa Came


Christmas 2010


Christmas 2010

Jessica


Hailey

Kaitlyn

Snowgirl

White Christmas 2010- Alabama


White Christmas 2010

Changes

2010-12-17T18:58:00.004-06:00

It is another time of change for us. I have been looking for a job that would work for our schedule for a few months but haven't really found anything that made me excited. So a friend of mine posted that she was working for Joann Fabrics & Craft Store, a new one opening in town, I thought this would be a good time to try for a part time night/weekend job. Great because I know someone who works there and because I have tons of retail experience and hello I like to craft! ;) So she gave my info to the other leaders and they called me to set up an interview, which I went to this past Friday. I went in expecting to fill out an application and do the two interview deal and then leave with the "we'll call you in a couple weeks" deal. That is normally what happens when you go to these type of things. So I did do all of that lol but I left being hired on the spot! :)

I go for orientation in early January and then the store is slated to open in early Feb, so I hope I'll start working soon after orientation. I am excited, I love crafty stuff and I hear Joann's is awesome, so I can't wait to shop too. I will be sad to leave the kids (especially K) but it's not the 1st time or the last I am sure.

So there is the good news post for the day!

Irritations

2010-12-17T12:57:00.000-06:00

Random post today, but things I find really irritating right now.

1. The fact that our school system is 20 MILLION dollars in the red. How does that happen? How does no one know this but the superintendent acts like it's easy to find out and everyone should know and NOT be surprised? Are you kidding me? I bet she's enjoying her 6 figure income and car allowance. So glad her contract did NOT get renewed.

2. School Calendar/Uniforms: I am not for nor against uniforms, if we have to do it, we'll deal. The only issue if they say you must buy a specific brand that cost $$$$. Khaki pants/shorts/skirts are all the same IMO, doesn't need to be a certain store. People who want to wear brand names will continue to wear brand names because that's what mom and dad buy. There is also current talk about taking away fall break next school year, and starting school about a week or so later. Again I am not for or against. I enjoy the fall break, we can do things as a family when it's a bit cooler. Would I miss it? Sure. Will I throw a fit if it's gone? No.

3. People who can't drive- enough said.

4. Healthcare Issues- currently going on. I can't imagine forcing someone to buy insurance and then making them pay a penalty if they don't. GRRR I will not even go into depth on this one.

5. Rude shoppers---again enough said, it's the holiday season and people seem to lose their minds.

6. Incompetent/Un-informed Doctors- mostly dealing with Spina Bifida and the fact they (drs) are still telling people how bad a life their children will have if they choose to continue pregnancy. Sure there are worse case scenarios, but how about real ones that happen every day? What about these wonderful babies who are thriving, doing everything the drs said they would NOT do? Yep this should be higher on my list, but this list is not in a particular order.

7. Gossip & Rumor Mills and the people who believe every word they hear. Can't change it but I can not participate in it.

I knew I would have more to add, so I didn't publish yet.

8. People who complain about EVERYTHING!!!

9. Being on hold for 45 mins during nap time, like I have nothing better to do? On top of it, the wait time was supposed to be 15 mins.

10. COLD mornings and no coffee!

Cold

2010-12-13T12:46:00.000-06:00

Freezing really, well I guess you could say below freezing since the temps will remain around 21 today, not counting the windchill. Last check was about 6 degrees for the windchill and it's almost 1 pm. Yes I know there are places that are much colder, but this is Alabama! We're not used to this cold weather. We actually had snow most of yesterday and this morning but it was soo windy that it really didn't stick. So off to school the kids in our city/county went. Though I wish they had stayed home since it is so cold. Tonight is not going to be any better and they are also calling for some freezing rain on Wed I believe. Not looking forward to that. I hate to see how cold Jan & Feb end up being.

A couple of "snow" pictures from yesterday:

So while it wasn't a lot, it sure was pretty while it lasted.

Thanksgiving Week

2010-11-30T21:03:00.000-06:00

It's come and gone but we had a great time visiting my mom and sister last week. The girls were excited to go see Nana and their Aunt and of course to eat the good foods. We headed out Tuesday afternoon last week for our trip and made good time for once! We did hit about 45 minutes of stand still traffic at one point but other than that it was a pretty uneventful drive down, thankfully. The week went by way to fast and of course as soon as it's time to go, we get one sick kid. It seems every time we go over to GA something happens, argh!

Well H woke up Sunday morning sick, she was pretty miserable. We were supposed to leave that day but decided another day of rest before being stuck int he car for 7 to 8 hours would be good. So we woke up early, 6 am on Monday and were prepared to leave...but no. H got up and had so much gunk coming out of her eyes she could not open them because it had dried up over night. It took about 10 minutes to get it all off so she could open them.

Then we decided it would be best to try to get her into an urgent care clinic before leaving, so after finding one, and she and dh getting there only to find out they did not take our insurance. Why we didn't think about asking BEFORE they left, I am not sure. The visit would have cost at minimum $100 plus any testing etc and then meds, at home it would have been just the meds. So we opted to wait and try to get home early enough and get her in on Monday. Of course that did not happen either, we didn't get home until 6pm due to a terrible traffic accident on the interstate.

Tuesday we finally got her in to get seen and what we thought was pink eye, was a sinus infection. However the gunk is coming from her eyes :( Poor kid, her eyes are terribly blood shot and shes congested etc. The doctor prescribed her some antibiotics so hopefully in a couple days she'll be much better. Though I hate shes got a sinus infection, I am glad it's not something like pink eye that's really contagious.

Overall we had a great week, could have done with out the sick kid but if that was the minimal downside, I can't complain! I hope you all had a wonderful time with your families and/or friends!

Not Good Enough?

2010-11-16T22:11:00.000-06:00

Ever feel like no matter how much you try or do for others it is just not good enough? I've felt this way off and on probably all my life but lately the part about doing things for others is getting to me. A LOT. I am tired of feeling this way. I try really hard to do things for myself, my family, friends and in general other people but yet feel unappreciated most of the time. Like what I did do for them, was just not good enough. I hate feeling like that. I hate that people can make me feel like that. The question is how do I change it? I obviously can not change their opinions (or what I think is their opinions) but I can change my way of thinking. That goes back to my how question, so how do you handle that?

I imagine most of us feel this way at some point or another in our lives. I just think it's time for a change and need to focus on me. Why do we care what others think so much? Is it ingrained in our minds as we're growing up, that if we can't do something "right", we are going to disappoint our parents, family and/or friends? I try really hard to not do that to my kids, but I am sure I've slipped. I am not perfect. I just want my kids to grow up and know they tried and it's OK if they didn't do something perfect or the way someone else wanted it.

I guess it's time for some soul searching to see if I can figure out how to not let myself get down when I think others are looking down on me or my actions. If you have any suggestions I am all ears... well eyes ;)

Winter

2010-11-09T21:16:00.001-06:00

The time is near, it's getting cooler day by day and that means cold weather wear comes out from the deep dark depths of the closet or from my crochet hooks! :) I've been on a crochet kick every since I learned the basic stitch and self taught myself the rest using youtube and various online tutorials. I've posted some of the stuff I've made, but here are the rest of my projects. :)

Kaitlyn's Hat

Hailey's Hat


Jessica's Hat

The snowflakes still need to be starched and stretched out to the right portions, but I think they are pretty cute.

Halloween

2010-11-09T09:15:00.000-06:00

I can't seem to blog on time these days, but I am trying to catch up! Jessica had her makeup on etc and was pleased with how it turned out. Hubby and my dad took the big girls out trick or treating while K and I stayed home in the warm, she napped and I got caught up on some emails. I am forever behind!

I have posted pictures like these for a previous post, but wanted to post the ones from actual Halloween. Enjoy!

Random Acts of Kindness

2010-10-27T21:30:00.001-05:00

I've recently been thinking about Random Acts of Kindness and how they affect people. For instance in car line this week, someone was getting in their car and ready to leave. They needed to back up but I was to far forward for them to really do so and the truck in front needed to pull forward. So I backed up enough so they could get out. They gave me a little wave and pulled on in front. A few spaces up someone else was getting into their car and both the car that I had let out and the truck in front had backed up so the next person could get out. Normally our car line is like the autobahn, you're lucky to get out alive! OK not quite that bad, but it's not often people will let a car pull out, because well gee then they would be in front of them for all of 5 minutes or less.

So today I participated and witnessed a random act of kindness. I am challenging each of you to go out of your way to do something nice for someone, whether it's returned or not. :) Let me know what act you performed!

I Dare You!

2010-10-27T10:25:00.002-05:00

Yes you, the one reading this blog! :) I love my live feedjit button, I can see who visits my blog (from where) and when and it's kinda of neat to see where everyone is from. I'm also curious how many lurkers are out there reading so here's hoping to find out!

Leave me a comment (lurker or not!)and tell me your favorite part of fall!

I Dare You!

Time, Parties, & Storms

2010-10-26T21:24:00.000-05:00

I am not sure where all my time is going these days. I have good intentions to sit down and blog but yet I can't really seem to find the time. I've been pretty busy lately with a variety of things, helping plan a Founder's Day Celebration with Girl Scouts, helping plan HMMT's annual Halloween carnival, Girl Scouts in general and life. So in between all that I should find time to blog, um right. That doesn't seem to be happening. I was hoping that since these two big things are out of the way I would have some more time, but in my case I think I will be just as busy with other events and such. I'll manage, I always do, I'll just be tired as normal lol.

The Founder's Day celebration was this past Friday. Overall it went well, all 5 of my girls attended and participated. They learned more about the Girl Scout founder, Juliette Gordon Low and received some badges/pins they had earned. Then that Saturday morning was HMMT's Halloween Carnival and it was fun. The girls had fun playing games and then helping run some games too. They both said they wanted to do that again next year. :) The highlight was seeing all the cute kiddos in their costumes. Now we're on to planning our holiday events!

Oh and FYI Girl Scout Cookie season will be starting soon!!! :) So don't forget to look me up when you're ready to order!

Finally the last part of my subject, storms. Boy have we had some storms around here today. Kids were released early due to impending severe weather and today is one I am glad they did. We had multiple spottings of tornadoes throughout Huntsville and Madison plus a couple of confirmed touchdowns. We took cover more than once during the 4 hour span. Thankfully they all seem to have passed us now without any damage in our direct area. I worry about my mom and sister since the storms are heading there way! We are hoping they fizzle out before they reach them.

Some pictures from the weekend to enjoy!

Remembering

2010-10-15T13:34:00.000-05:00

Today is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day, a day to remember those babies that are in Heaven that one day we will meet. I know so many who have lost babies during their pregnancy, some early on and some quite late, and no matter the time, it hurts. I struggle with this even today because not only is it an awareness day, it is also the date my angel baby would have turned 1. You see today was my EDD for the baby I lost in Feb. 2009. Last year on Oct. 15, I stayed in bed mourning the baby that should have been all day (though I was pregnant with Kaitlyn at this time) because even though we were lucky enough to go on to have another baby, it still hurt.

I can remember the day so clearly that I was sitting at the doctors office waiting for confirmation that I was indeed miscarrying and in walked a very pregnant woman. It was all I could do to NOT run out of there crying. I went up to the front desk and asked them how much longer it would be and she was quite rude ( I don't think she works there anymore) and said I didn't have an appointment they would have to work me in. I went back and sat down and one of my favorite nurses came and took me back. She apologized for the rude lady, she knew why I was there, she told me the doctor would be in soon.

As I sat there waiting I wanted to get up and go to the front desk and ask that lady had she ever lost a baby that she had been trying for a year to have and then have to sit in a waiting room full of people that were pregnant or holding newborns? Because if not, then she has no idea what it's like. It's like someone taking a knife and stabbing you in the heart and twisting over and over. You cry, you are sad, you are mad and don't want to be around people who are pregnant or have newborns. You don't care they are happy or so uncomfortable because they are ready to pop, because at that moment you would do ANYTHING to be that happy or uncomfortable if it meant your baby was still alive.

A friend of mine recently went in for their 20 week ultrasound and to find out if they were having a boy or a girl. While it was a surprise baby they were happy and excited to find out if they would be adding another boy or a 4th girl. Unfortunately there was no heartbeat found for the little boy during the ultrasound. Even with my own loss I can't imagine going in at 20 weeks and finding out my baby had died. I just want to hug her and let her know I am here. Anyone who has lost a baby will tell you there are no real words of comfort at this point. Just knowing there are friends there for you in case you want to talk or need someone to watch the other kids while you grieve is what you want, what you need.

So today I am remembering my little angel in Heaven along with all my friends and their angels.

It's beginning to feel a lot like Fall!

2010-10-07T22:07:00.000-05:00

Finally, the weather has cooled off, the leaves are changing and it's been chilly in the mornings. I LOVE this weather! Now if only I could find somewhere in the US that had this weather 365 I would so move there. :)

It's hard to believe it's already October and tomorrow Kaitlyn turns 5 months old. Music screeching to a halt. What?? 5 Months already? How does that happen? Sigh, my baby is growing up so fast and changing before my eyes. This time around seems harder to digest it, maybe because she's my last?

October to me is also the kick off for the holiday season. It seems once October rolls around the year just flies by, seriously. We have fall break this month, then Halloween, next thing you know it's November and Turkey Day! We all know what happens when Turkey Day arrives, it's crazy insane shopping getting ready for Christmas time. Oh how I love it though, I love the sales, the bustle of the season, spending time with family and friends near and far. :)

There is no better way to end or begin a year in my opinion. Family and friends, it's what life is about these days isn't it? I know for me it is, as Kaitlyn's birth defect put a lot into perspective for me. I am cutting out the negative in life and trying to move forward and only look at the positive and be around positive people.

Speaking of Christmas, did you know there are only 78 days until Christmas! I know, I know, but seriously I need to start making lists for the kids, start shopping and thinking about where we'll be for the holidays. :) Have you started shopping? I am sure some of you are finished, I am jealous, but life threw us a curve ball this year so we're still trying to get our feet under us again. :)

Project Finished

2010-09-28T11:31:00.000-05:00

Yay, I got J's scarf done today. I had finished the crocheting part a couple days ago but took a few days off. Today I finished the scarf, had to weave the ends, especially at the color changes, and put the fringe on. She thinks the scarf is for me, so she'll be quite surprised today when I give it to her. :)

I still need to add some fringe to Hailey's scarf and then I am done with my current projects. Wonder what I'll do next....maybe a blanket for K or some hats for the girls... still undecided!

Updates A Plenty

2010-09-24T09:26:00.000-05:00

Well I am behind in the blogging world these days, I've had a lot going on recently. I don't even know where to begin to catch up lol.

My last post was pretty depressing, so I'll try to make this one better :) My rim is fixed and my tire is back on the car. We found a place that refurbishes rims and sells refurbished ones, so thankfully we were able to get mine fixed and it only cost $140 compared to $600 plus for a brand new one! My next worry was my tire pressure monitor system, it's been "messed" up since I hit that metal thing in the road. Hubby drove my car around the n'hood yesterday to make sure the tire was balanced and the light did NOT come on! So I think it was because the donut tire on there wasn't the right pressure, therefore it was lit up. WOOT, that means we don't have to spend another $100 plus to get it checked and repaired.

The kids are doing pretty well, J & H got their progress reports last week and both had all A's.. well ok H had all S's but that's equivelent to all A's. :) K is doing awesome, I just updated the other blog on her. We're working on cereal and juice with her this month, juice is going well, cereal not so much LOL. I need to take some pics of them all this weekend, so hopefully I'll have some to post next week.

I've been spending less time online these days and getting in touch with my crafty side. My Girl Scout troop learned to crochet a little over a week ago and that's what I've been doing. I've made 2 scarves so far and working on a 3rd one now. I love it, it's relaxing and I love creating things with my hands. My next project will be a hat! Eventually I want to learn to make snowflakes and make a set for my tree.

Here is some pics of my scarves:

This is my scarf :)

Up close of the stitching

Hailey's scarf, still need to add the tassels

Up close of stitching, different than mine :)

Jessica's scarf, just beginning, but also a different stitch

This will be a two tone scarf, purple and off white

All three scarves have different crochet stitches, which makes them a different design. I really am liking the last one (Jessica's) so I may end up making myself one like that as well. :)

Life

2010-09-08T20:25:00.000-05:00

Life, well just sucks sometimes. I've not blogged in awhile, not really had anything good to blog about and this post is probably a bit too depressing for most, so sorry in advance.

There has been a lot of crap going on in my life lately, both personal and non personal and it doesn't seem to be ending anytime soon. This past weekend was supposed to be a good weekend, a get away from the stress of life and other stuff. The weekend itself was fine, got to spend time with my family which was nice, but of course just about anything that could go wrong went wrong. Where to start....I guess the tire situation. I was driving down 65 in Birmingham and drove over something metal and very hard. I messed up my rim and tire pressure monitor system. The rim alone is going to cost about $600, then labor. The diagnostic for the sensor is $100 not counting labor and replacement if needed. I am very worried about finding out the price of that. Of course there are no Suzuki dealers around here anymore, so we have to choose another and let them order the rim. This snafu caused a normal 6 to 7 hour drive to turn into a 13 hour miserable drive for us all.

While on the way to GA, I was going slower than the speed limit due to the donut tire on the car and had this idiot literally try to kill us. He was tailgating like crazy, so I just kept slowing down so he would pass. Oh he finally passes and then flips us off and then swerves his truck over and tried to hit us. Yep that would really get him down the road SO much faster. Yeah where is the State Trooper when you need them? The drive back took about 10 hours, since K was in such a great mood (note the sarcasm) and was crying almost the entire way back.

So another issue in my life, my right hearing aid started acting up about a week ago. Just randomly started going off and then it would turn back on. I thought it was just a random thing, but no, over the weekend it kept getting worse. Finally it just went out completely. It turns on when you close the battery case, but it just keeps cycling through the start over and over again. So now I am down to one, I can barely hear, I don't want to be around anyone either. So called to get my hearing checked and h/a checked on, they told me they couldn't see me for almost 2.5 weeks. That's not going to work for me, I need the h/a to function daily. So then I called my ENT, got an appointment for my hearing check on Friday, hopefully will be able to get an adjustment for the h/a DR. on Friday as well, if not it'll be the following Friday. I did get my h/a dropped off Tues with the DR, so hopefully they can fix it, if not they have to send it off to get repaired. Cost: $275 at minimum. Lovely. The h/a's are out of warranty of course.

Top all this off with the constant hospital bills arriving in the mail daily and collectors calling daily, so yeah life is just freaking funtastic right now. So if you think I've been ignoring you or whatever, that's not the case. I have a lot of crap going on my life right now, so give me a break, K?

On a side note, sent my resume in for a job, that I think I would enjoy, so could you say a prayer and/or send some positive thoughts my way? I don't really want to work, esp with K still being so young, but when the bills are piling up like they are, I must do something, short of selling everything we own.

I Got Crafty

2010-08-19T08:33:00.000-05:00

I finally did it lol, I got my sewing machine out and made something! It's literally been over 15 years since the last time I actually used a machine to make something. I started off with something fairly easy, a "taggie" blanket for K. It turned out pretty well and would not have taken long had I pinned the stuff right the 1st or even 2nd time LOL. I kept looking at it as I was pinning the ribbon but could not figure out what was wrong...then dh pointed it out. OH, light bulb. Um yes, except when I corrected it, I still didn't pin it correctly, I am blonde, give me a break.:) Now that I know how to make them the right way the 1st time, next one should NOT take long.

Some pictures :

School Days

2010-08-10T20:43:00.000-05:00

This past Monday the big girls started school, Jessica in 5th grade and Hailey started Kindergarten. My babies are growing up! So far so good, both like their teachers and are excited to go to school, but we'll see how long that lasts. The homework hasn't started yet lol.

Here are a few pictures of the girls on their 1st day of school

Jessica & Hailey 1st day of school 8/9/2010

J- 5th Grade

H- Kindergarten

Happy 10th Birthday J!

2010-08-06T12:04:00.001-05:00

Well I'm a few days behind in posting, but I am trying to catch up!

Jessica celebrated her 10th Birthday on Aug 2nd and it still seems unreal to me. How in the world did 10 years go by that fast? How is it, on Monday she'll be starting 5th grade? How can I be old enough to have a 10 year old? Oy! She had a great birthday, we celebrated by going to a playdate and taking cupcakes for everyone, they even sang happy birthday to her. We came home and she opened her gifts. She got tons of art supplies, she's very interested in drawing, painting etc and she got some new DS games and accessories. My mom bought her an IPOD and she's been playing with it since she got it. Later that day, we all went to the Chinese buffet for dinner, since it's the birthday girls choice then it was home for Cake!

Tonight is her birthday party with friends. She's got three other girls coming over for a slumber party/dance party. We've got the mirror ball hung, the black lights ready, decorations up and food to eat. I don't foresee much sleep in my future tonight lol. They have some arts and crafts to do, tons of music to choose from and games to play. She and H are excited and have been practicing their dance moves.

I made her birthday cake for the party, it's a jukebox cake. Umm well that's what it is supposed to be. I'll post pics later and you can decide! Thankfully I am not a pro and it shouldn't end up on Cakewrecks LOL.

New Blog

2010-07-29T19:49:00.000-05:00

I feel the time has come to add another blog, one specifically related to K's diagnosis and Spina Bifida. This blog is supposed to be varying content, but with all that is going on, I feel like I need a separate place to put it all down. So while I'll still update here occasionally on K's SB, it'll be more focused on my family and life as a whole. I also feel lots of mommy guilt, since I blog here mostly about K and leave J and H out. So I am working on that, plus there are other things I want to blog about too. :)

If you wish to stay up to date with the most recent info on K, please follow our new blog:
Our Spina Bifida Journey

This is a work in progress and is just beginning, we hope to see you there.

Weekend Update

2010-07-21T19:35:00.000-05:00

J and I made it home from Girl Scout camp at Camp Trico. Overall it went well, the girls all seemed to have a blast, despite the rain, heat, bugs and squeaky beds. We lucked up and were able to stay in the unit houses and they had air conditioning! WOOT. I know, I know, it's not really camping if you have AC, but when it's this hot in Alabama you are thankful for what you get. :) I admit I went prepared, I took an air mattress and a small plug in fan (yep we even had electricity and indoor bathrooms) so I would be more comfortable. In fact it was suggested that the adults bring the air mattress to put on top of the mattresses on the bed because they were so thin. I was the only one that listened and I slept great. I bet next time they listen!

We arrived Friday evening, had our sack dinner and then the girls got to do a few crafts. They made some name tag necklaces and medicine bags to put their beads in they earned during camp. Unfortunately our campfire that night got rained out. So we headed to our bunkhouse to get settled in for the night. Saturday morning we woke up bright and early to head down for breakfast and then out canoeing and for Indian crafts. While I did not go canoeing, the girls seemed to be loving it. They were all nervous and a little scared their boats would tip, but they did awesome. One of our girls got scared and cried and came back in early but ended up back out there and loved it. So glad she gave it another chance.

After lunch that day, there were Indian games and archery to be done! We took a short hike on the way to the Archery site and by short I mean NOT really short lol. After learning the basics all the girls got to shoot 5 bows and one of our girls even got a bullseye! I know she was proud. Then it was off to swimming for a few hours before dinner. I would not exactly call what we had "dinner" but it was something to eat. We had what was called a "hobo dinner", which essentially was a frozen hamburger patty, corn on the cob and some thawed tater tots thrown into tin foil and wrapped up and put in the fire.Once it was cooked, you simply opened it, put together your hamburger and ate. Ummm, this had to be the most unappealing looking food I've ever seen. If you haven't had it, I don't suggest it.

Before and after dinner, we were lucky enough to have a group of Native Americans come to our camp and bring all kinds of neat things for us to look at. Plus they ended up singing, dancing and playing music with us. It was the high light of the trip for me. We had a real Chief there and she was like a sweet ol' grandma. Just wanted to hug her. :)

Soon after it was time to head out for s'mores! It was a beautiful night, a slight breeze and tons of chocolate and yummy gooey marshmallows! The girls were exhausted and soon as they hit the bed they were out like a light. Sunday after breakfast and clean up we headed home. We managed to shower and eat lunch before passing out for a good nap.

A few favorite pics from the weekend

Camping Time

2010-07-15T12:11:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow I embark on a 3 day camping trip with 5 Girl Scouts and 3 other parents. That means the odds are pretty good right? I am trying to tell myself this will be fun, it has to be right? It's camping, how boring could it be. I have not been camping since I was about 18 and well let's just say things were different with 15 friends vs taking 5 Girl Scouts.

I am looking forward to the fun trip with Jessica. She's so excited about all the fun activities we're going to do. She is ready for canoeing, archery, swimming and of course the campfires and s'mores! I think I am most looking forward to the Indian Pow Wow. They are supposed to be in full dress and perform. Can't wait! I hope to get some good pictures to share when I get back, so we'll see.

Oh have I mentioned how HOT it's going to be or the good chance of rain all weekend? This is the part I am not looking forward to. I can deal with a little rain, but do not want bad storms or rain all day. Say a prayer for us will you?

Healing

2010-07-12T20:37:00.000-05:00

Miss K is doing great, her incision is healing properly and she got her stitches out today. I was worried how she would react, would it hurt her etc, she just kinda of laid there like it was no big deal. :) We return to UAB in 3 months for a MRI so they have a baseline of what her spine is like since the surgery. We were hoping for a 6 month break but I would rather them be thorough and know exactly what is going on with her.

Thanks for the thoughts and prayers!

Middle of July? Already?

2010-07-11T22:00:00.000-05:00

How is it almost the middle of July already? It's been a busy summer and will continue to be for us. I guess that's good in some ways and bad in others. School will be starting back in a month, bittersweet for me. H will be going off to Kindergarten, J into 5th grade ( umm what??? ) and it'll just be K and I at home. That will be a change for sure. I am looking forward to the quiet(er) days!

Tomorrow we head down to UAB for K's 2 week post op visit. Hoping it all goes well and everything looks good and hope we will not be back to see Dr W for 6 months. We do have to make another trip the following week but to see the urologist. I am nervous about tomorrows visit, not quite sure why. K seems to be doing great here at home, eating, sleeping, and moving around as normal....but there is still so much unknown. So if you could say a quick prayer or send some positive thoughts our way, it would be appreciated.

J and I are preparing for Girl Scout camp this upcoming weekend. I am looking forward to spending some one on one time with her (along with the rest of our troop lol) and I know she is too. The part I am not looking forward to? Camping....well really the no air conditioner part, it's kinda hot down here in Alabama! Never the less, there is camp fires planned, an Indian Pow Wow, canoeing, archery, swimming, crafts and games. What else could be more fun? I hope this trip gives J a lifetime of memories.

J's 10th birthday is coming up August 2nd, and I still find that hard to believe. How is it I am old enough to have a 10 yr old? Well, OK I am old enough to have a 15 yr old if I started having kids when I was 18. However, I digress. Sometime between all the other stuff going on, I still have to plan a party and get ready for school to start too. I wonder if I can buy some time in a bottle somewhere?

Wish us luck for tomorrow!

Two Months Ago

2010-07-08T12:21:00.000-05:00

Two months ago, my world seemingly got turned upside down. Two months ago K was born via c-section after trying for a vbac for 12 hours and not really progressing. Today I look back at that and am thankful because we had no clue about K's Spina Bifida. We also do not know if her lipoma could have ruptured or not during birth as it was half filled with spinal fluid. The last two months have been stressful, happy, sad, worrisome and so much more but right now I feel at peace.

K had surgery approx two weeks ago and sometimes I am still trying to wrap my head around that. My 6 week old baby had major spinal surgery. She could have been paralyzed, she could have major bladder/bowel issues, she could have required another surgery to put a shunt in her head. She could have been. She's not paralyzed, had a very short term bladder issue and she did not need another surgery. Miracles happen. Prayers work. Believe it.

When K was 4 days old I found a support forum for people living with Spina Bifida or parents of children with Spina Bifida: Spina Bifida Connection . This was my saving grace. The people there are inspiring, helpful, friendly and most of all been there. To be able to connect with other moms/dads who have been there and done that, to know I am not alone in this journey is priceless. Reading their stories, blogs, and helpful posts in regard to my own situation, I learned so much.

I learned that K having Spina Bifida is not the end of the world, just a different world. Her life isn't going to end or not be fulfilling because she has a birth defect. She will go on to lead a fulfilling life filled with love, joy, friends and family.

I am learning to live in the here and now and not in the future. No one can predict what will happen in the next 6 months, year or 10 years and rather than worry and dwell on it, I am living life and enjoying time with my 3 girls.

UAB Surgery Update

2010-06-27T22:56:00.000-05:00

I just realized I never updated my blog about K's surgery this past week. Sorry about that, was just to busy emailing updates, posting on facebook and HMMT to get here too. So anyway, K's update.

We arrived in Birmingham on Monday morning for K's pre-op appointment with Dr. Wellons, which led to a series of other stops here at the hospital, pre-admissions, and lab work being done. First thing we found out was that K's surgery had been moved to Wednesday morning at 7:30 am rather than Tuesday due to an emergency case coming in. It was a little frustrating but I am glad we did not have it Tues afternoon, because it would have made for a very very long day. So bright and early Wednesday morning we were here at Children's Hospital (early as in 5 am!) and thankfully was one of the 1st called back. Once we got back to the pre surgery room, we spoke with the drs and such and answered questions about K etc and then they took her off to get drugged up. Surgery was expected to start soon after but it was 8:30 before it got started, and they told us about 3 to 4 hours. True to their word, right about 12:30 we found out the surgery was complete and was successful. The staff was great on updating us every hour to hour and half on surgery and K's status.

She had to spend a couple hours in recovery while we waited on a room and bed to be available and it wasn't until about 4pm we got to the room and they finally brought her in. It was so great to see her, I was really worried she would be hooked up to all these things but she only had her IV in. The worst part not being able to hold her. Dr Wellons came and talked to us right before we got the room and told us how everything went and thankfully he did not have to detach any nerves during the detethering. She still had movement in her hips, knees and ankles as before. He did have to leave a smaller version of the "hump" aka cyst so that the nerves would remain intact and everything would heal properly. So she's had to be flat since surgery, on her stomach or on her side with no one picking her up. We've had to feed her while she's on her side and change her diaper with her on her stomach. We've gotten used to that, but it still sucks to not pick your baby up when all you want to do is comfort her.

Overall she's doing well post-op with the exception of bladder control. She's unable to really urinate right now, could be the nerves are just irritated and swollen or it could be a side affect that she has to live with. I am hoping for the first and hope it resumes normal functions soon. Right now she has to be cathed every 4 hours and boy are the nurses having a hard time. She's so small and swollen it makes it quite difficult and to think we are going to have to do this at home, sigh. I hope it's just short term, so please say a quick prayer on that.

We are waiting to find out if we are able to leave tomorrow (Monday) to come home. Dr Wellons wants us to pick her up and hold her as we do at home to check for spinal fluid leaks in her incision area. So far so good on that, so if all goes well we'll be able to return home. I am ready, the girls are ready for us to be home as well. I'll try to update with more info later this week after we get home and settled.

Thank you for all the well wishes, thoughts and prayers for baby K and our family.

Tooth Fairy Visit

2010-06-18T14:28:00.001-05:00

Hailey got her first Tooth Fairy visit last Wednesday and boy was she ever so excited! It's quite funny since her tooth just became loose or enough that she noticed it on the Friday or Saturday before. She's been complaining for months that her teeth were hurting but guess they were just loosening up for her :)

So the Tooth Fairy left her $5 for that special 1st baby tooth and do you know within an hour or so of getting up she lost the money!?? OY! Here is a picture of her the morning the tooth came out.

She doesn't look excited at all does she?

Countdown

2010-06-15T23:58:00.000-05:00

We're in the final countdown to Kaitlyn's surgery, a week from today hopefully it'll be over and all will have went well. I am still having trouble processing that her surgery is next week. How did it get here so fast? We head down to UAB in the morning for her urology testing and also for a ct scan. I am not sure if we'll find anything out in regard to the test or if they will call us or wait until the pre-op appointment to let us know. Her pre-op appointment is next Monday the 21st, so it's not that far off but I hate waiting. Hate.It.

We had to do a little scrambling to cover childcare for the older two girls since the surgery was sprung us earlier than we anticipated. However we managed to find some family to take care of them, though I am honestly not thrilled with the whole situation, but what's a mom to do? I am just going to pray about it and hope the house and my kids are still standing when I get back.

Miss Kaitlyn turned 5 weeks old today...and that's harder to believe I think than the fact of surgery being next week. She is much more alert these days is starting to focus on us when we're talking to her etc. I wish she would sleep a little better at night, but I know that'll happen in time. Sooner than later would be nice! ;)

Wish us luck tomorrow, will keep everyone updated when we know more info.

UAB Appointment Update

2010-06-09T17:37:00.000-05:00

Just wanted to give an update on Kaitlyn and her UAB appointment from yesterday. I know most of my blog readers already know all of this but a few do not :)

We saw Dr Wellons on Monday (the pediatric neurosurgeon) down at UAB and overall things went well. Originally we were told Kailtyn had a form of Spina Bifida called lipomyelomeningocele, but yesterday he told us she has Spina Bifida Occulta. She definitely has a tethered cord and he'll have to do the surgery to untether it along with removing the growth on her back. We were told the growth was most likely fatty tissue at HH NICU but he seems to think its more fluid than fatty tissue but I think she is considered to still have it, because she does have the growth and the spinal cord is attached inside of it.

We got to see her MRI and it does show the tethered cord but it also showed that her nerves were still attached which is why she can move her legs/feet so well right now. There is a chance that the surgery could result in leg weakness and/or Kaitlyn not being able to walk depending on if he has to cut the nerves or not.

We go back on 6/16 for an appt with the Urologist and also for her to get a CT Scan. Her surgery is scheduled for 6/22, but we have to be back on 6/21 for the Pre Op appt with Dr Wellons and then we'll stay there for the week.

The CT scan is being done to see if she has any fluid in her head, called : Hydrocephalus right now he doesn't think so but he wants to verify before surgery. If she does they will have to place a shunt to drain the fluid back down, and there is a chance she will need it even if there isn't currently fluid there, due to the surgery (since the growth may be fluid filled).

The surgery is expected to take about 4 hours (if no complications) and the recovery time is atleast 3 days, and she has to be flat on her back the entire time. So we'll be down at UAB from 6/21 thru 6/25 or 6/26 at the very least.

Thank you all again for your thoughts and prayers and please continue to pray for us and Kaitlyn.

10 Years Ago

2010-05-27T12:26:00.000-05:00

I married my wonderful hubby! It's amazing how much time can seem to fly by when you're so busy with every day life, kids, work and school. Some days it feels like we've been married forever, like its hard to remember a time when we weren't married. Other times it feels like it was just yesterday we were standing in the chapel before friends & family saying our vows. Either way, I am blessed to be married to such a wonderful, caring, and loving man and I am grateful to have him in my life.

In our 10 years we've been through some really tough times, some that I wasn't sure we'd make it out of and still be together. However there's been so many wonderful times they overshadow those tough ones. The tough ones just made our marriage stronger and better and I know now we can overcome anything.

Here's to many more! :)

Random Kid Updates

2010-05-26T15:31:00.000-05:00

I've really not blogged much in the last few weeks and since K's birth it's been mostly about her, which is understandable. I do want to update on all the kids though because you know mommy guilt is eating away at me:)

I'll start with Jessica. She's finishing up 4th grade, and has 2 more days to go and is done for the year. Last week they had their award ceremony and she got several awards. 3 certificates for being on the A honor roll (3 of the 9 weeks) and 1 for A/B honor roll plus a good citizen award and math Olympiads. I can't believe she's going into 5th grade next year! She also got asked to participate in the schools safety patrol next year. Basically she helps with the car line in the morning and afternoons, opening doors etc. We'll see how long she actually likes doing this ;) A couple of her friends are doing it to, so she'll prob do it as long as they do.

Hailey finished up with preschool last week and I think is already missing it, so am I. She really enjoyed going and seeing her friends and loved her teacher. She has come along way in learning things this year and her attitude has improved as well. Though some days you can't tell, but she's a typical 5 yr old! Hailey also starts Kindergarten this fall. How did this happen? I swear it feels like she was just born but now I have another little one at home. She is very excited though to go to her big sisters school and start Kindergarten.

We have only 12 more days until K's UAB appointment and I am feeling anxious already. I will probably be a nervous wreck the morning of the appointment, so it's probably a good thing we're going down the night before instead of trying to drive at the butt crack of dawn for an 8:30 appointment. I need to find a hotel and contact my SIL about keeping the big girls overnight for us that Sunday night before the appt. This will make it much easier on us to talk to the doctor, find out info and ask any questions we have.

Overall Kaitlyn is doing well at home, she seems pretty laid back and seems to only cry when hungry or needs changing. I am sure that will change in time but for now we're enjoying it. I just wish she would sleep a little better at night, she does fairly well during the day, so I hope in time she'll start the night time sleep better too.

It seems right now the big girls are OK with Kaitlyn being here, no major jealousy issues have come out...yet. I think Jess will be fine most likely as she's done this before, but Hailey on the other hand I am not so sure about. Fingers crossed that since she has someone to play with it'll help with that and not want/need my constant attention this summer.

Living in a Foggy Daze

2010-05-17T14:00:00.000-05:00

I have been in a foggy daze since Kaitlyn's birth. I thought for sure it was because of the pain pills, but I've been off of them for about 5 days or more so I don't think it's related. I do ~~think~~ know I am way overwhelmed at Kaitlyn's diagnosis, the thoughts of all the things that could go affect her later in life or even in the next few months. The fact I don't really know much more 9 days after she was born than I did after finding out she had lipomyelomeningocele (further known as LMC). I don't think there has been a day since she was born I haven't had a breakdown at some point in the day and my poor husband has no idea what to do for me, other than tell me he loves me and things are going to be OK. I want to believe they will be OK but until I talk to the neurosurgeon at UAB in June I don't feel I can process this all enough to really believe things will be OK.

I need to call and make an appointment for a 2 week checkup with my OB and I will talk to her about my feelings and see if she thinks it's PPD related or if I am just having anxiety about the diagnosis etc. I don't know that I am depressed per se, but I am down at times, happy at times, sad at times and mostly scared of something happening to Kaitlyn. I am in total agreement with the statement, you never think something is going to be "wrong" with your child. I don't feel there is something "wrong" with Kaitlyn in my eyes, just that she has a medical condition that needs more attention.

On the plus side, she's doing well adjusting to being home. I am slowly getting more comfortable handling her, though I am still nervous I could hurt her by sitting her down wrong or putting her diaper on to tight, etc. Her big sisters love her to death and they always want to hold and feed her. Plus they can't wait til she's bigger so they can play with her. We did get a call today from the pediatrician because the levels of her thyroid test came in a little high, so dh took her in this afternoon to get retested. I hope they were just a fluke high, the nurse did say that it was possible and they could be just fine today. I really pray they are, because I honestly don't know if I can handle anything else right now.

In the midst of all this I do realize how lucky we are, because I know the diagnosis could have been worse and she could have needed surgery immediately after being born among many other things. I have wonderful friends who have offered to help in any way they can, babysitting, meals, coming over to just chat etc and knowing I have such tremendous friends, is a god send. I may not need them right this minute, but in the coming months after our trip to UAB, scheduling surgery and such I know they will still be there for me. For that I am very thankful and grateful.

Power of Prayer

2010-05-12T20:19:00.001-05:00

I believe in it. Kaitlyn was released from the hospital today and is doing great. We went into visit this morning and to get some answers from the doctor who had not called as promised and I was NOT going to leave the hospital until we had them. The nurse came over and started talking about the Dr coming in this morning and that the surgery would be outpatient so she would be going home. I was kinda in shock, had tears in my eyes because all along this is what I wanted but only if it was 100% safe to do so. We never saw the Dr in person, but hubby did talk to him on the phone and found out they are going to refer us to another hospital and a pediatric neurosurgeon who is more trained in this particular issue.

So tomorrow we have a follow up appointment with our regular pediatrician and they will get the referral for the other doctors. We have two places to choose from, UAB and Vanderbilt, I've heard good ab out both but want to do my research and figure out which we should choose. The surgery will also not be done until she is a little older, my guess is around the 2 to 4 month stage, but that's just based on what I've read online. They want her to get stronger and bigger before doing the surgery and since hers is closed it's not a have to be done immediately surgery. Though I prefer it to be sooner than to much later as I don't want it to affect her everyday life.

Thank you to everyone who said prayers and kept us in their thoughts during this rough time in our lives and please continue to think of us and baby Kaitlyn for her upcoming appointments and surgery.

Welcome to the World- Kaitlyn Nicole

2010-05-11T17:50:00.001-05:00

I am happy to announce that Kaitlyn Nicole has arrived!

Stats: 5/8/10 @ 2:22pm via C-Section
7lbs 4oz and 19 inches long

Birth Story:

Friday evening about 11 pm my water broke at home, so we headed to L&D after my dad came over to watch the girls. We arrived around midnight and was admiited right away. I had been having a few contractions but nothing I thought was going to lead to a baby lol I had planned on trying for a vbac, so I did not want to be induced. The dr and staff was fine with it and supported me the entire time. I was 1 cm still when we arrived and after several hours of contractions, some painful, they checked me and I was about 1.5 cm but still only 50% effaced. We decided to keep going and see if I would dilate & efface more.

My contractions did start to pick up enough but not enough for progression. So I went ahead with a low dose of pitocin at 6 am but still was only about 2 cms and 50% effaced. At 10 am I decided to get the epidural since the contractions were becoming more painful and closer together. I was finally at 3 cm and they were upping the pitocin amts every 30 min, which lead to upping every 15 mins because I was starting to stall at 3 cm and only 60% effaced.

By noon the nurse and dr said we might want to start thinking about how long I wanted to continue to labor since I was at 12 hours by this point and not really progressing. We decided to continue for another hour and then check to see if I had any more progress and if not then we would make a decision. The contractions were still coming strong and were about 2 to 3 mins apart but at final check I was still just about 3.5 cm and 60% effaced. At 1, I decided to call it quits and have the c-section before my bp went crazy or Kaitlyn went into distress.

They began prep for my c/s, but the spinal meds were not working and did not numb me at all, so unfortunately they had to put me to sleep to deliver Kaitlyn. She arrived at 2:22 via c/s at 7lbs 4oz and 19 inches long. As you have seen me mention on facebook, Kaitlyn has a growth on her back/spine area. It's about the size of a small orange. It's called : Lipomyelomeningocele ( a form of Spina Bifida) , basically a rare birth defect that happens in 1-2 of every 10,000 babies born. Short version is that it is a fatty mass that is located under the skin on a childs back and normally located in the middle. The mass goes inward to the spinal canal and covered by skin.

They transported Kaitlyn to HH NICU soon after she was born, I only got to see her for about 2 mins after I woke up in the recovery room. Leon nor I got to hold her before they transported her. That has been the hardest part, not seeing or holding her since being born. Leon was able to go to NICU this morning and visit with her and hold her.

We hope to have some answers about the surgery she is going to have sometime today and what kind of side affects will be possible from this both before and after surgery and how long her recovery will be, when she'll be able to come home. This has been a very difficult time for us so we really appreciate all of your thoughts and prayers. I will continue to update as often as I can.

Any Day Now

2010-05-07T16:35:00.000-05:00

Dear Bebe G,

Your family is ready to meet you. Please come any day now so that I do not have to be induced in 11 days or end up with a RCS. Don't worry if you're holding out because we don't have a specific name for you yet. We have 3 to pick from (sorry readers no hints) so you will not be nameless forever. :) I do think we'll still call you Bebe G on occassions though, because we've been calling you that for almost 20 weeks now.

Sincerely,

Your loving and not so patient mommy

14 Days

2010-05-04T09:45:00.000-05:00

That's the amount of days possibly left in this pregnancy. How did that happen? Where did the time go? I have to say this has been the fastest pregnancy I've had as I can't believe it's almost over. For most people the end seems to drag by but for me it was the beginning, when I was so sick. I didn't think the morning sickness was ever going to go away. Thankfully it did but not until about 20 weeks.

I went for my 38 week check up yesterday and all is well. My blood pressure is holding steady at a normal rate, bebe g's heartbeat was in the 140's and I was actually dilated to 1 cm. While that's not a lot I am happy to know the contractions I've been having off and on all weekend were doing something. They have continued but aren't getting any closer together or stronger, so let's just hope it's my body preparing for labor.

I feel like bebe g will make her arrival this week before Mother's Day, not sure why but just a gut feeling. It wouldn't be so bad, since I am full term now and overall ready as I'll be. I need to run to the store and get some bottles, pacifiers and such, which I hope to do today, but other than that I think we're set for the arrival. I also want to get the girls something from their baby sister but haven't even begun to think what yet. Guess I can add that to my to do list.

I go back to the doctor Monday for the 39 week check up, if I make it. Send some P&PT my way please!

Sunday Catch Up

2010-05-02T15:14:00.000-05:00

Wow it's been a while since I last blogged, I wanted to earlier this week but was unable to due to no internet. So I'll do a quick catch up, though I can't promise it'll actually be quick as it's been a busy week.

I had my 37 week check up last Monday, my blood pressure good, bebe g's heartbeat was good, but alas there has been no change since my last appointment. I was really hoping for "something" to have changed to feel like my body is working towards its goal. I have my 38 week appointment tomorrow, fingers crossed for some good news. I have been having some contractions off and on this week and over the weekend. I don't feel labor is really right away the corner but you never know. My mom even called this morning to tell me she had a dream that I had the baby.

Earlier this week a few friends threw me a surprise baby shower, I was very surprised. I had a really bad day earlier so it was a much needed break and just the cheering up I needed. Got some great baby gifts and can't wait to use them all. :) We're doing bebe g's "corner" of the room in pinks & browns, and some of the gifts match perfectly. I love my friends. :)

Tuesday we were supposed to get our cable done and internet/phone changed over as well. That turned into a disaster, and I'll just say that after 3 days with nothing, it was all finally fixed around 6 pm no Thursday evening. Not a fun week to say the least, I had quite a bit of stuff I needed to do but was unable to and now I am behind and trying to get caught up.

Onward to the weekend, Friday night was Huntsville's Relay For Life event in which HMMT has participated in for the last three years. This year we were joined by some members of another local moms group and we all had a great time. The last two years has been rained out midway through or canceled and postponed due to severe weather, however this year the weather was perfect! We all had a blast, and our t-shirts even won 2nd place in the competition and we have a little trophy to show off. :) We're still a little short of our goal, so if you have it in your heart to make a small donation, we would appreciate it. Just click the Relay for Life button to the right and it'll take you to the donation page.

The rest of the weekend has been recovering, watching for weather and playing catch up, hence the title. Hope everyone has a great week!

Home Sweet Home

2010-04-26T11:11:00.000-05:00

Whew, what a busy but fun weekend in Nashville with some great friends! I am so glad I was able to make it and enjoy one last girls weekend away before Bebe G arrives. We were in for some severe weather, but thankfully it pretty much missed us in Nashville and here at home in Huntsville. Sure there was thunderstorms and a lot of HEAVY rain, but overall nothing serious. Some other towns did not fair as well though.

We arrived in Nashville around 11 or so and did the lunch thing and then started some shopping. I scored about 15 outfits for Bebe G for less than $80 from Carters & Osh Kosh B'Gosh. Sooo cute, their clearance was an additional 30% off the lowest ticket, so I couldn't pass up the deals...though I have tons of baby stuff here lol. Later that evening we got together with some of the girls and had dinner and some yummy desserts along with more shopping (see a theme here?) before heading back for the night. A few of us stayed up quite late (around 2 am ) chatting and laughing. Though I was tired on Sunday, it was so worth it. Before heading home on Sunday, we all decided to try to get a haircut, but no one could get all 5 of us in, in a reasonable time frame without us staying until 5 or so. We were not thrilled with that idea lol so we just went to lunch at Logan's and finally headed home.

Overall I did pretty well, there were a few times I had to stop and rest, due to some contractions and/or getting over heated. It seemed REALLY hot at times inside Opry Mills. Saw quite a few interesting characters while people watching and resting. On Sunday I noticed my ankles were quite swollen, my guess from all the walking on Sat and some Sunday too, so once home I propped them up for the night. They have gone down some today but not all the way.

Today is my day of rest and my 37 week doctor appointment. Here's hoping for some change!

It's the Weekend Baby!

2010-04-23T10:45:00.000-05:00

It's been a rough week and I sorely need this upcoming weekend. I am going to Nashville with 7 other ladies, all from HMMT, for the weekend. We leave tomorrow morning and hopefully will avoid the weather that is being predicted. The plan is, shopping, relaxing, eating, maybe some other shopping, relaxing, eating, and sleeping lol and finally coming back on Sunday. Poor hubby will have to stay home with the ~~kiddos~~ with just one of the kiddos because the other is going to a birthday party/sleepover. How does he get so lucky?? Oh wait, he'll still be stuck with the stubborn, strong headed , not listening 5 yr old though. :)

On other weekend news, it's supposed to be raining and possible severe weather on Saturday afternoon both here at home and in Nashville. They are talking possible tornadoes, which really doesn't help my blood pressure any. I already get antsy with that weather, but to be away from the family, one kid at a sleepover and being 2 hours away, just doesn't help. I pray it dies down before it hits here and we just all get some thunderstorms.

Next weekend at this time, we'll be getting ready for Relay For Life. The last 2 years we've got rain, storms and probably tornado like weather and not made it all night and or the event has been cancelled and scheduled for later. Right now, the weather looks to be NICE for that weekend and oh how it would be lovely to have an actual all night Relay, please keep your fingers crossed! By the way since I am talking about it, please go make a donation to our team! Just click the Relay button over to the right and make a donation, any amount to help find the cure for cancer! :)

Hope everyone has a great weekend!

36 Weeks Down, 4 Or less To Go

2010-04-20T11:25:00.000-05:00

It's official, I am on the final countdown until Bebe G arrives! Next week at this time I'll be considered full term and it's A-OK with me for her to arrive anytime after that. I had my 36 week check up yesterday, you know the fun stuff. Sitting in the paper "cover" for 20 minutes are so waiting for the doctor, having the baby push its feet so far up in my ribs I can't breathe, having the GBS test done, and the ever so fun dilation check.

I'll stop there and just give you the basics lol. My blood pressure was good, 122/88, bebe g's heartbeat was 150 range, they did a quick ultrasound to determine if she was head down and she was, WOOT! Then I was hoping for a slight dilation...but nope. I guess those contractions I had last Monday were just the body prepping for the real thing. I am a little dehydrated, so I've been instructed to drink water, lots and lots of water. So I am trying to do better, I keep a cup of water with me at all times, but I still don't think I am drinking enough, which is obvious.

We are making progress on the to do list, we bought a new mattress set this past weekend. Our old one will move to J's room, J's to H's room and the mattress for the toddler bed back to the crib for Bebe G. Works well for everyone, and we REALLY needed a new bed. The one we have is a firm and it's just not right for us, we need plush, so that's what we are getting, can't wait!

So now taking bets on when Bebe G will be born :) Check it out: http://www.expectnet.com/games/BebeG

Bebe G Update

2010-04-07T16:54:00.000-05:00

I went to my 34 week checkup on Monday (yes today is Wednesday- I realize that) and overall everything is fine with Bebe G and I. My blood pressure was slightly elevated, 144/88, but I think it was due to the egg disaster we (the playgroup) was facing, thankfully that's resolved now! I saw the NP, but she again didn't seem overly concerned, I guess mostly because my bp has been under control through out this pregnancy. The NP had a little trouble getting Bebe G's heartbeat because she moved every time she found it lol. That's my stubborn girl.

This appointment was also the "decision time" appointment and even walking in the door I still had no clue what I had planned to do. If you haven't been keeping up, I needed to decide between having a RCS (repeat c-section) or VBAC. I have never been so indecisive in my life, well OK except in naming my kids, especially Bebe G since we still haven't finalized that yet. I told the NP I wanted to talk to the doctor before deciding and signing off on the paper.

There are so many reasons (some personal and some medical) to choose either choice, but I felt I just did not know what to do. My heart was saying one thing my brain another, hubby one thing and me idling on the fence...but thankfully he is supportive either way. I've read and read online about the "best" choice, but it really does boil down to a personal choice. Each one has it's pros and cons and I spoke with several friends who have gone through this choice and know their stories now more in depth. I believe their stories, talking with dh again and reading other stories online helped me make a decision along with talking to my doctor.

I've pretty much decided to "try" for a VBAC providing my body goes into labor on it's own. Meaning I do not and will not be induced unless there is a medical reason to do so (as it has been in the past for me) and my doctor is on board. If I go into labor, and my body does not progress within a reasonable time frame, then I will have a RCS rather than an induction. If I do not go into labor or have signs of going into labor near my due date, I will likely go ahead with the RCS as well. I would much rather have a planned RCS than an emergency one due to my own experiences and from what I read online and from people I know.

I know for sure that I do not want to labor for 20 plus hours only to end up with an emergency c-section like last time. I was exhausted, had no clue really what was going on and it took me awhile to recover both mentally and physically. So as of right now this is my plan, to wait and see how my body does and my doctor agrees with me. I have time, 6 weeks before my estimated due date, so only time will tell.

Happy Easter

2010-04-04T19:00:00.000-05:00

Wishing everyone a Happy Easter from our family to yours :) Some of my favorite pictures from today :) Enjoy!

Money Saving, Coupon Crazed Moms Club

2010-03-31T12:52:00.000-05:00

I have to admit, when I first heard about all this couponing and people saving 50% or more on their bills, I was quite skeptical. I grew up in a house that never did the couponing thing, until my stepdad came along. He was cheap err I mean frugal and kept a coupon box and clipped religiously on Sundays. If we didn't have a coupon we pretty much didn't buy it etc. I am sure we saved money, but being military we did 90% of our shopping at the commissary where they do take coupons but unheard of for doubling, stacking or taking competitor coupons. So you see I did not know of this elite club of couponers who were stacking coupons, using coupons that double, trading online etc until the last year. Even then I was to chicken to look into it, I mean really could I save 50% on my bill?

I wasn't to optimistic about any of this until the last few months, when moms in my group started posting all these deals they were getting, free things (not samples) and how much t hey had saved on groceries. I became intrigued, a member does a couponing 101 class and I was able to get some one on one time with her. She taught me about SouthernSavers. I had looked at this website before but did not understand the lingo and was thoroughly confused. I was a newbie and did not know what RP or SS meant along with the other mile long list of acronyms. I listened and ingested what she said and decided to give it a try.

The first couple of weeks, I collected Sunday papers with coupons, read on SouthernSavers, tried to make a list etc. I was still very overwhelmed, so I started off small, looking only at the Bogo sales at Publix and using coupons for those items. I began to save money but still not enough that I felt like I got it. I did not have enough coupons or the best deal, I was only getting 1 paper on Sunday and that just isn't enough. Now I buy at minimum 2 papers on Sunday, recently purchased a copy of All You magazine (has TONS of coupons) and am watching for good internet printables.

So all in all I have learned it takes some time to get to the point where you feel you know what you are doing and start seeing the actual savings. My last trip to Publix I spent $300 but I saved $100 in sales & coupons, so I saved 25% on my bill. Not great, but it's a start. I also went to CVS (that's another way to save) and bought 3 packs of diapers, 2 bottles of body-wash, and a tube of toothpaste for $27.52. I saved $31, so a savings of over 50%! Plus I have some ECB's to use towards my next purchase.

So yes I admit it, I am a member of the Money Saving, Coupon Crazed Moms Club and proud of it. Are you?

Progress Update

2010-03-28T15:42:00.001-05:00

This week & weekend has been prep work time for Bebe G. We've done quite a bit and still have more to do but I feel we're moving in the right direction. Guess that nesting instinct is starting to kick in lol.

Accomplished
*Bedroom rearranged
*Car Seat purchased
*Stroller purchased
*Swing purchased
*Basinet found/washed

To Do
*Put crib together
*Put changing table together
*Buy dresser
*Buy baby essentials (diapers, wipes etc)
*Buy new bedding set
*Pre-register at hospital
*Pack bag
*Decision on Vbac or RCS
*Finalize name list and/or pick one

There is more to add to the lists but I can't locate my "to do list" sheet right now hehe!

We went shopping this weekend at BRU since I had a coupon for $20 off a car seat and $20 off a stroller, and we did end up buying there, since the coupons expired yesterday. We choose a neutral color stroller (light tan) but it's girly with some pink and flowers without being over the top! I looked at the crib sets they had, soo many to choose from and soo many cute ones! I think I've pretty much decided to go with a pink/brown theme, and thankfully there is a lot of those to choose from too. The downside, stomaching the prices! Holy cow they are expensive. I do have a 20% off one item coupon, so I may still buy from there. I've been looking on Amazon and Ebay too.

The girls are getting more excited about it getting closer to time for Bebe G's arrival, and so am I. I am trying to really enjoy this part of the pregnancy, though I am having a hard time with aches and pains. However I tell myself this is likely the last time I'll ever be pregnant so even tough it's been rough, I need to stop and smell the roses. I really enjoying feeling her move around quite a bit these days, she's quite active in the mornings when it is time to get up and at bedtime. This has to be my favorite part of the pregnancy!

On to week 33!

32 Weeks Down...8 To Go

2010-03-23T21:48:00.000-05:00

Time is trucking along, or so it seems when I think I only have 8 weeks or less to go. Then when I think of all the millions of things I need to do before Bebe G's arrival, well then it seems like we are speed walking to the end.

I went in for my 32 week check up, all is well. Blood pressure was in the "normal" range and her heartbeat was good. Though she was moving quite a bit, every time the dr found it, she'd move again lol. I asked her about my swelling left ankle and feeling of it 'falling asleep' but not really. It just has been getting numb off and on and only that leg. She said it could be the baby just sitting on a nerve just right and to keep an eye on it and my salt intake and let her know if it continues. Glad to know it didn't sound like I should be overly concerned as of yet.

She asked if I still wanted to try for a VBAC...which at the moment my mind is on yes. However there are doubts in my head about it. I labored with J for about 16 hours but had her vaginally, but I never got past 4 cm on my own, they had to induce. H was an emergency induction, labored hard for close to 20 hours and ended up with an emergency c-section since I didn't progress past about 4 cm. So now I have to choose which route to go. I've been reading up on VBAC's vs a repeat c-section...and am so torn. I know some ladies who have had VBAC's and it's gone great and I know others who have tried (and had previous c/s) and ended up with a c-section anyways. I just don't want to go thru another long and tiresome labor to only end up with a c-section, which could very well happen.

There are pros and cons to both...but I feel so lost and torn.

More decisions to be made....

Sleepovers, Painting, Couponing & Swelling, Oh My!

2010-03-21T19:12:00.000-05:00

Whew what a busy and exhausting week & weekend I have had. I think the title gives it away, that's been my life since Thursday afternoon. J has been begging and I mean BEGGING for a sleepover with her Girl Scout friends for months now. It seems every time we tried to plan it, something came up or someone was sick. So finally during Spring break she got her wish. I had 4, 9-10 yr olds and a 5 yr old that partied non stop for just about the next 24 hours. Half of them were up til about 2 am and the other half til about 4 am..which means little sleep for mom and dad lol. They all seemed to have a great time though, dinner, movie, popcorn, nail painting, talking and game playing. Glad it's done and they have all gone back home though :)

Friday night was my much needed girls night out with 5 other friends. We had signed up for an art class at a place called Spirited Art. It was a lot of fun, yes I was trying to be a perfectionist on this painting lol but I did manage to put the brush down and walked away. The great thing about it is, it's not supposed to be "perfect", everyone in class is painting the same thing and yet they all looked different. My picture is growing on me as the days go by lol but still not sure where and if I will hang it up for others to see. I'll post a picture tomorrow, I haven't had time to take one yet.

Somehow I thought it would be a good idea to sign up for an "extreme couponing 101" class the next morning. Umm what was I thinking? I was exhausted from no sleep on Thurs. night, then stayed up late for the painting night and still got up early for Sat morning??? Yes it's quite obvious I wasn't thinking. ;) However I am glad I went to the class, it was great. I learned much more than I already knew and feel more confident about couponing and soon will start CVS'ing. If you are interested in learning more, the class I took was held by Jenny, who is the owner & coupon guru of Southern Savers. In my opinion it was worth the $10 for the class, especially if you are new to couponing or just want to learn more ways to save money on groceries.

So this brings me to my final topic, swelling. First however let me tell you, sitting in a plastic chair for 3 plus hours on Friday night plus another 3 plus hours on Sat morning is NOT good for a 32 week pregnant person. OUCH, I am still sore and it hurts to sit down. So take my advice, don't do it. EVER. Seriously. Listen to me. So the last day or so I've had some swelling in my left ankle and my leg/foot feels kinda of numb. It's been that way for several hours this evening and it's driving me nuts. I plan to ask my dr about it tomorrow when I go in for my appointment. I've also had some contractions, getting a little stronger here and there but not really painful nor radiating from my back...so I am hoping it's nothing as well. I'll update tomorrow after my appointment.

Time To Get Crafty

2010-03-16T23:01:00.000-05:00

I pulled out the old (well new and basically never used, bought 2 yrs ago on clearance) dusty sewing machine out yesterday. I am on a quest to become more crafty. I once was a crafty girl, learned to sew in school and did pretty well, but that was about 17 years ago. So to say I am rusty, well I am right up there with Mater from Cars and might need a little Rust-eze to go with it., is my friends an understatement. ;) So I dusted it off, literally, and tried to thread the machine yet again and make sure the bobbin was working. Guess what? It worked, apparently the last few times I tried to use it, I did NOT have it threaded right. Sigh. Guess it helps to re-read the directions when all else fails.

So on my quest, I have been looking at Craftster because I LOVE that site and decided I want to make some pillowcase dresses for the girls. Once I master that I plan to move to a rag quilt, which is much easier (so it seems) to make than a regular quilt. I found some really cute fabric at wally world today for both the dresses and the quilt...but stuck with just the dress stuff today. I have some other fabric that I plan to test out a dress for H and see how it goes before I start cutting on my new fabric for both girls. We'll see how it goes, if it turns out, I will post a picture. I make no promises though.

Wish me luck!

30 Week Bebe' G Update

2010-03-10T19:17:00.000-06:00

I went to my 30 week check up this past Monday and am still having a hard time believing that I am this far along already. Shouldn't it be like week 15 or something? I can't wrap my head around the fact I only have 10 weeks to go, or less! I would be OK with a little less lol like 7 or 8 but we'll see. I want bebe g to be fully cooked and ready.

So on to the update, weight wise, I am still doing good. I gained 3.5 lbs in 2 weeks. Hmmm, all those late night cereal snacks are catching up to me. I am still under my beginning weight now by 1.5 lbs, if you've been keeping up. I've gained back 15.5 of the 17 I lost, if that helps. My blood pressure was slightly up, 144/77, however the nurse nor the NP said anything. I was kinda of surprised, since last time it was up the dr thought I may need to up my dosage of BP pills. I have been waiting on the phone call lol but so far nothing. It was a quick appointment, I think it took me longer to drive there than it did for the appointment. Not that I am complaining, since I really haven't been having any issues, I expect short and sweet for the most part.

We're slowing making progress on the to do list for bebe g's arrival. The room is almost set up to get the crib put in and the changing table as well. We still need to put them together, but not doing so until we get the room set. I need to buy a car seat, asap in case bebe g does make an early arrival. My list keeps growing of things to do but I am just not going to stress myself, what gets done gets done. I just want the major stuff done so I can relax a bit.

I return to the dr in 2 weeks and I need to hurry up and decide if I am going to do the 3d/4d ultrasound or not. Decisions, decisions.

Happy 5th Birthday H!

2010-03-10T11:05:00.000-06:00

Happy 5th Birthday!

Birth 3/4/05

1 Yrs Old

2 Yrs Old

3 Yrs Old

4 Yrs Old

5 Yrs Old

We celebrated H's 5th birthday this past weekend and I really do mean she had a birthday weekend! We let the birthday girl pick the place they want to eat, and she of course chose Applebees. There was no doubt in my mind she would lol it's her favorite place. She liked it even more because they came and sang happy birthday to her and she got free dessert. Can't go wrong with that!

On Friday we had some playgroup friends over to celebrate, they played, they ate, played and ate some more lol and H had a great time. She was sad to see her friends leave though, but soon perked up when she learned she would be going to CEC on Sunday. So bright and early Sunday morning we took the kids to CEC (which who knew they opened at 9 am on a Sunday??) and had the whole place to ourselves for about 45 minutes. PERFECT. We had pizza/breaksticks/drinks and tokens galore and stayed for about 2.5 hours, they loved it. I've always hated that place on weekends, but now know that 9 am on Sunday is the best time to go. They will be begging to go back soon, we still have tokens left!

She got a lot of fun toys for her birthday, I think the "winner" is the zhu zhu pet and house. Oh boy she was so excited opening that present lol now J is jealous and wants to go buy some herself lol. I was thinking maybe the Easter Bunny could bring some. We'll see.

All in all she had a great birthday and see I stressed myself out trying to figure out what to do and in the end she didn't need a huge fancy party just friends and family!

Progress

2010-03-03T14:47:00.000-06:00

H's 5th birthday is tomorrow, and while I have made progress on birthday preparations... I am still not ready. That shouldn't surprise many of the people that really know me, since I tend to procrastinate often.

H and I went and picked out cakes (yep plural) for her birthday celebrations on Monday, dh picked them up from the store today. So one thing marked off the list. We decided on two cakes since she wanted to take cupcakes to school to celebrate since tomorrow is a school day (I paid she's going!) and a cake for her party here at the house on Friday. I did manage to plan a small friend party for her on Friday at the house. I wanted to plan it somewhere (Little Gym, etc) but it just wasn't in the budget. We're going to have pizza, fruit, crackers and juice for lunch along with cake, play a couple games and just let the kids play.

Tomorrow evening we'll take her out to eat and let her choose the place. In the last few years it's been Applebees, it's her favorite. So I am sure she'll pick that, but I could be wrong. Not that I have ever been wrong about my children before. Nope not me. I think on Friday I plan to try to take them to go see the Princess & The Frog at dollar movies, if its still playing. On Sunday morning, the plan is to take H to Chuck E Cheese (Chunky n Cheese as H calls it) and do the lunch coupon thing with tokens. She's been begging to go there, and I hear Sunday morning usually isn't to busy.

That will conclude the 5th Birthday Celebration!

Bills and Randomness

2010-03-01T12:49:00.000-06:00

I am so tired of bills lol as if everyone else in the world isn't either! We got our federal tax refund last week, so our plan was to pay off dh's car and my bionic ears. Thankfully it was enough to do both and leave just a tad bit left over. Not much though, as I forgot to get taxes taken out of my pay from my job, so that shorted us some. It's such a relief to have those checks written and know they are paid off, and it's freeing up some money each month, which obviously we need due to bebe' g coming soon.

Did I mention coming soon? Yep 11 weeks or less to go and we have nothing ready. Name not picked, crib nor the changing table put together. I do have clothes sorted, just need to be washed and then find somewhere to put them... I feel like things are piling up fast and here I am overwhelming myself with to much stuff, so I am trying to slow down.

My to do list is growing by the second and not only with baby stuff but life stuff, group stuff and girl scout stuff. Where does it end? We have 2 months until Relay for Life, which is good and bad. We've got a lot still to do and money to raise, and I feel lost on all that this time. I don't have the time to dedicate to it, as I have in the past years. Add in working on HMMT's Spring Fling and just trying to get things ready here at the house, it doesn't leave much time for extras. That extra would be Girl Scouts. Thank goodness cookie sales is almost over, just another week and we'll be done! Then just a few more meetings to plan before they end for the summer and some fun activities to do during the summer, which I may not get to go to but the girls will enjoy them.

I am probably tempting fate trying to go to one last moms weekend away trip before bebe' g is born. It's scheduled for a week before Relay and is in Nashville. I need this, I want this, but am worried I may not get it. H was born at about 38 weeks...so we'll see. Fingers crossed!

Enough of the whining, I still have tons to do this week in prep for H's 5th Birthday!

28 Week Update

2010-02-22T20:08:00.000-06:00

Today I have my 1 hour glucose test, which thankfully I passed. :) I was so nervous, not sure why, I've only failed once and that was with H, but it was only by 1 point. I think I've just been stressed out this entire pregnancy, worried about one thing or another. Tomorrow morning I have to go get my 2nd Rhogam shot, so not looking forward to this. Not because of the shot, but because it takes SO long. Blood draw, wait, shot, wait and finally get to leave, seems to be about a 4 hour process. I wouldn't mind as much if I didn't have to get up at the butt crack of dawn to get there by 8 am.

I am at the point in my pregnancy where I start going to the doctor every 2 weeks now. The next one is my 30 week check up, hard to believe I've gotten this far this fast. My blood pressure was pretty good today as well, which I was sure it was going to be up today due to the test lol.

Weight wise I am still doing great. I did gain 2 lbs this past month, that's a total of 12 however I am still down 5 lbs from my initial visit, therefore haven't gained any. Hmmm wonder if I can get by and only gain about 12 once I break even? Would love that and to drop down to less than my pre-pregnancy weight was after the baby is born. Wishful thinking I am sure.

Still playing the name game, she may end up as Bebe' G lol

I'm Free......Free Falling!!!

2010-02-19T18:19:00.000-06:00

Well OK not quite that free, but I am free of work! My last day was this past Thursday. Bittersweet. I had a plan, to go in and talk to my director and try to work through to Spring Break if possible and if they had someone before then, it was OK by me. They understood, and I think they knew it was coming sooner than I had originally expected. She wanted to make a few phone calls and see if they could find someone so I would know when to expect my last day to be. By the end of the day, they had found someone and could start next week. I was already scheduled off on Tues, due to my rhogam shot that morning but was due to work Thurs. However, I no longer have to! She said I could work if I wanted to until Spring Break but it was totally up to me. I decided to take advantage of the 13 weeks I have left and have some me time while H is in school on Tues/Thurs.

So while I'll miss the gals I worked with, the craziness, fun and often hectic times, I know this is for the best. For me and Bebe' G. On the plus side I have more time for some playdates and personal things before she arrives and that will be nice.

Slacker Mom Award of the Year

2010-02-17T08:49:00.000-06:00

I just won it.

H's birthday is in 15 days, count them, yes 15 days and I have done absolutely nothing in preparation for this. It's her 5th birthday, special because she is officially a big girl and gets to go off to Kindergarten this fall. I wonder if I will remember to register her this fall? Maybe if I put a giant post it note on the bathroom mirror I have to see everyday? Fingers crossed.

I can't believe I am not ready, J's birthday last year snuck up on me too and we just ended up with a small family thing, she was happy but still. Life just happens sometimes and I feel awful and definitely feel like a slacker mom right now. To be fair I have been thinking about her birthday and what to do, who to invite etc but can't seem to pinpoint the date, time, invite list.... my life is consumed by soo much right now. Sadly it's not going to slow down.

HELP!

One Year Ago Today

2010-02-14T14:03:00.000-06:00

I came to the realization that I was miscarrying the baby I had just found out about on Feb 1st. My little one would have been approximately 4 months old today, had I carried to full term. I am sad about it, and I have friends who had babies around the time my little angel would have been born, but I am trying to not dwell on this. I am happy for them, happy they did not have to go thru the pain I did and happy they get to hold their little ones.

However sad I am today, I am trying to rejoice in the fact that I am carrying a sweet little girl who is due in about 13 weeks. It's been a hard and stressful pregnancy but in May it will have all been worth it. There are days I am still paranoid something terrible is going to happen, especially when I notice she's not moved much or that I just haven't felt her move. Then it's like she knows, and she moves around for me and I breathe a sigh of relief.

I knew Valentine's Day would be a little hard and I was right, but we awoke to a beautiful snowy white ground. As I sat listening to the girls being excited about the snow and anxious to check out their gifts, it made today much better.

RIP My Sweet Angel Baby

Health Update & Randomness

2010-02-08T20:27:00.000-06:00

I managed to make it to my blood pressure recheck last week,since hubby took the girls on over to their dental check ups. Unfortunately I had to wait an hour to get the recheck done as they work on a number system. Hubby was done with the girls, they had come back and to play and they were about to drive over to my dr appt and wait outside. Yes that is correct, they had their 6 month check ups, played and yet I was still not done lol The good news is that it was 131/60 which was down from the 140/90 the week before, the dr was pleased so I was on my way.

In a couple more weeks I get to go for my nasty glucose test and also to get my 2nd rhogam shot for this pregnancy. Of course it was scheduled for a Tues morning but I requested off so hopefully there will be no issues. I've been quite sick since going back to work in Jan, I can't seem to kick these colds I pick up at school. So due to this and my bp issues I am trying to figure out what to do in regard to how much longer to work. I honestly could quit now, but am trying to hold out another month, but just two days week is so exhausting to me. We'll see how it goes.

I've been asking around about the 3d/4d ultrasounds that friends have had, and I am definitely interested in doing this. However it is around $120-$150 out of pocket to do so, ouch. I still think its worth it though. This is my last pregnancy, I would like the girls to see, they weren't allowed in for my 20 week ultrasound and also to ease my mind it is indeed a little girl I am carrying around. I am going to talk to hubby about it more, but I think he'll say yes.

I am still irritable so if I bite your head off, I am sorry!

Irritability

2010-01-27T15:55:00.000-06:00

I swear I feel like I am pms'ing and nope I am not, but I am sure grouchy. Feel free to skip this post as it's mostly rants.

Why oh why do you ask for advice and then when several people give you good advice or give you examples how to change things, you still act like you didn't get any advice? Don't ask if you don't want to know.

Please just answer the freaking emails already, it's not that hard to hit reply and type in a quick sentence. I am not asking for a book report. Come on already!

Why is it one of my kids decide to get sick when I have dentist appointments schedule 6 months ago? So yes we had to reschedule them both, not just one. FAIL

Also why is it when they are rescheduled they are rescheduled for a day I already have a doctor appointment??

Well there are a few of my irritable moments for today, I am sure I will add more later.

24 Weeks, 10 Pounds & Counting Down

2010-01-25T19:19:00.000-06:00

I went to the Dr today for my 24 week appointment for Baby P, and while I figured I had gained SOME weight, I was NOT counting on 10 lbs!! I mean really, who gains that much in a months time?? Well I do apparently. However, when we were talking about, she said not to worry, because I was still down less than what I was when I came to my first visit. That was a little reassuring, as I don't want to gain over about 25 lbs, but we'll see how that goes. I have been eating more since I have finally begun to feel better, no more morning sickness nor stupid cold I could not get rid of. I still don't necessarily believe I am 24 weeks pregnant...I mean wasn't it like yesterday when I found out? I've got about 3 months and 2ish weeks left before Baby P is due to arrive.

The appointment today went well, except for my blood pressure was up a little, 140/90. I am bp pills and have been since I started going, but I did forget to take one this morning, so I wonder if that caused it to be up. The last few times I have gone it's been in the 120's/130's over the 80's . Either way she was a little concerned so I am going back in a week for a recheck on it.

My next appointment is a month away, and I get to do the fun 1 hour glucose test. YAY, um not. I just pray I pass this time. :) After that appointment, I'll start going every 2 weeks, that's when the real count down begins. All this counting down also means I am running out of time to come up with a name for Baby P. Guess it's time to sit down with some books and come up with a list and narrow it down.

Wish us luck!

From the Mouths of Husbands

2010-01-24T20:05:00.000-06:00

Well normally it seems most people post the "out of the mouths of babes" well this is the twist lol

H learns songs at her preschool, they learned one about animals and how they act. It's called "Animal Actions" and goes a little something like this:

"Animal Actions, they're so much fun"

When she sings I hear

"Animal Reactions, they're so much fun"

What my dear sweet husband hears

"Animal E*ections", they're so much fun" and I'll give you a hint, it's not elections.

OMG lol seriously???

Gave me the best laugh I have had in quite some time!

Old As Dirt or Just Alabama

2010-01-15T18:12:00.000-06:00

So yesterday over dinner, J asked me "so was Alabama a state when you were little?" I about choked on my soup! Apparently I am over 191 years old, gee thanks for making your mom feel good about herself. Even today I still don't think she quite gets what she said lol Thankfully I am not QUITE that old but sure does feel like it some days.

Not much has been going on since my last post, and seeing all these other bloggers posting on a daily basis, makes me feel like a slacker. Thanks guys! :) Just kidding, I wonder if because most of the blogs I read are from moms of small children, and well mine aren't exactly small anymore. They are entertaining to read though, because it takes me back to when mine were that small and to think I'll have another one to add to the bunch in May. Perhaps then my blog will pick up? Hmm lack of sleep with a newborn, somehow I don't think so.

So to my blogger friends, what inspires you to post?

Snow Days and Randomness

2010-01-08T20:13:00.000-06:00

Well Alabama had another "snow day" yesterday and today. The entire city was pretty much shut down by yesterday afternoon, including all school systems. I didn't mind so much honestly, it made where I basically had a 3 week holiday vacation as well as the kids. I have a lot of friends who were not happy with schools being closed, and I can understand. However after seeing how roads iced up around the time the schools let out, I was glad I chose not to send Jess in for 3 hours.

We didn't get a lot of snow, maybe half an inch if that, but it was SO cold and continues to be that way. I haven't set foot outside since Wed morning and that's OK with me. The wind chills are in the single digits, that's enough to make my face feel like it might fall off! lol I was probably one of few who did not send the kids out to play, they did not even really ask, which was alright with me. There is still some "snow" aka ice on the ground and some road ways from what I understand, and it'll probably be here a couple more days since it's so cold.

Other than weather days, not much else exciting going on. I was hoping to go to Bunco tonight but woke up with a terrible migraine. Even after taking a 3 hour nap this afternoon it would not really ease up, so I missed it. Tomorrow night is the HMMT's 4th Anniversary party. I can't believe it's been 4 years already and we're still going strong. I am looking forward to another fun filled year with a lot of events and fun!

On the baby front, I am finally noticing the little frog moving around quite a bit. She's not so active I can feel her on the outside, but I can definitely feel her moving around. We've been tossing around a few names, but nothing even close to being set in stone. The girls want to name her Ashley and my sister wants her middle name to be Lauren, so Ashley Lauren. While it's a pretty name, it reminds me to much of Laura Ashley, so I don't think it'll make it to the finalized list.

I am also finally feeling better, morning sickness seems to have moved on and a little energy has returned, yay! I hope this trend continues since I have a lot to do before the baby's arrival. I go back to the doctor at the end of the month for my next checkup. I am having a hard time believing I will be 24 weeks then!

Have a warm & cozy night!

Back to the Grindstone

2010-01-04T13:17:00.000-06:00

Tomorrow that is. That is what the little bit of what we call normal returns, well except the fact J is still out of school until Wed. However I return to work tomorrow and both girls will be tagging along, unless dh is still home sick. I knew he would come down with what we've all had, and I hope it's short lived for him. He called in today and he's not the type to do that unless he feels really bad.

We've had a great two week vacation, family visits, movies, staying up late and sleeping in, but I am looking forward to school starting back. Except maybe the work part for me lol, but I only have about 4 more months to go and it's only twice a week. I do wonder though with the impending weather on Thursday and Friday if they will keep school on schedule. Yes it is Alabama and yes the city closes down when there is a real potential threat for inclement weather.. but really you should be happy. Have you seen these people drive in the snow?? I have and it's not a pretty sight. We'll see if the snow stays in the forecast for the week, but even if it doesn't snow, it's going to be below freezing EVERY day the rest of this week. The wind chills are expected to be below 0 several nights this week. So not looking forward to that.

I've been busy catching up on meetup business and trying to keep the house semi clean, pretty hard to do with both kids home. Also been making lists of things I need to buy for the baby's arrival. So far the list is short, since we have the majority of all the big items still, whew! I am hoping to find some things at some of the upcoming Spring consignment sales. The biggest thing I need to do is move H from her toddler bed into a twin, so we can have the crib mattress back. I need to check on some prices and see if I can get it for her birthday maybe.

I also made a couple New Year's Resolutions....not sure why, since I rarely keep them lol

1. Be more organized & efficient
2. Be more patient with my children
3. Be nicer to my husband

They seem doable, right? Just nod your head in agreement and I'll be happy!

Happy New Year

2010-01-02T10:43:00.000-06:00

Where did this last year go? I still feel like it's 2009 and have a few more months left, but then I realize Christmas has come and gone and New Years as well.

A quick review of 2009

* In Jan I booked our family vacation to Disney for May
* On Feb 1, I found out I was pregnant but two weeks later miscarried, starting Valentine's Day
* In March, we decided to go ahead with our Disney trip as planned
* We also celebrated H's 4th Birthday in March
* March thru the beginning of our trip, I threw myself into planning our vacation
* May 21 we leave for Florida, the girls had no idea we were going to Disney
* May 22, we wake them up and give them a gift to open and surprise them with the trip, they were excited
* Spent a week at Disney, had the most magical time with the family & a great anniversary there
* June and July were spent going to play dates with friends
* August was brought in with the celebration of J's 9th Birthday & the beginning of 4th grade
* H also started moms day out twice a week (a god send)
* During this time I also began looking for a part time job, had a hard time
* Good news later in Aug, found out H's school was looking for a program aide, 5 days a week
* Hired in early September and started right after Labor Day
* After working that week, found out I was pregnant and boy was morning sickness kicking my butt!
* Soon after it was Oct, and I was having a few issues and was worried about losing the baby
* Oct 15th came, my due date for our Feb baby. Had a rough time
* Celebrated Halloween with family & HMMT group party
* In Nov we had a nice quiet Thanksgiving at home with my dad and FIL
* Christmas time arrived quickly and that brought my mom, stepdad and sister to visit. It was great Christmas!
*A few days after Christmas, I had my 20 week ultrasound, found out the baby is a GIRL!
* We spent NYE home as a family, let the girls stay up until 11 to watch the ball drop and we soon went to bed after. The CST really needs to have some kind of celebration!

Last year had its ups and downs but one thing I can say for sure, is that we are closer as a family now. :) I can't wait to see what 2010 brings us and hope it's happy & prosperous for all!

Baby P's Ultrasound Results

2009-12-31T13:17:00.004-06:00

Dh and I went to the doctor on Tuesday morning bright and early for my 20 week ultrasound. I was still quite nervous, because I was worried something would be wrong with the baby. We knew we would be happy no matter if it was a boy or girl, but we were both leaning towards wanting another girl.

We were called back pretty promptly, which was good, since all the water I drank in preparation was urging me to run to the restroom LOL. The tech explained there were things she couldn't tell us and what she could, she would. She pointed out body parts as we went along, and it was so cool to see the baby's heart actually beating.

She took a lot of pictures and here's one of the baby's face.

After 20 minutes or so, she began trying to find out Baby P's gender and it wasn't an easy task! The baby was moving around like a little Frog! Finally she got a picture, paused and turned to us and said calmly:

It' a Girl!

We were of course happy and came home with quite a few pictures of baby girl, but now it's on to the name game!!

Christmas & Baby Updates

2009-12-28T18:09:00.000-06:00

Christmas has come and gone but it was wonderful. :) Stress free, enjoyable and spent quality time with our family. It really doesn't get any better than that. My favorite gift this year was definitely the time spent with family I had not seen in over a year. They arrived on Tues. night very late and we spent four days with them. They were good to the girls, Santa was good to the girls and we are just very blessed.

The girls love all their presents and can't make up their minds which ones to play with more often. Some of them still have not been opened up yet....we still have the rest of this week before school starts back. I told them to spread it out, enjoy what you have now and play with something new later this week. The house is a disaster with toys all over, but I don't care.. today anyways!

Went to my 20 week appointment today, so far so good. I have lost a couple pounds since my last visit, which actually makes me not have gained anything since I got pregnant. Good I suppose, since I am still wearing my same clothes. I think I weigh less than I did before I got pregnant actually. I am sure it will show up and will probably be overnight! I was like that with J, didn't really start gaining until about 6 to 7 months. Thankfully the doctor gave me some antibiotics for this cold I can't seem to get rid of. I've had it for over a month now, so once I start the meds, I hope to feel better soon.

Tomorrow is the big ultrasound at 9 am. Still nervous and anxious, but so far everything is good. The heartbeat is strong, my blood screenings all came back normal, and I think I am starting to feel the baby move around occasionally. I will feel alot better when I feel him/her move constantly.

Stay tuned for the big announcement tomorrow....or I hope to anyways! Let's pray baby cooperates :)

Christmas Time, Christmas Time

2009-12-21T15:27:00.000-06:00

It's almost Christmas time! Hard to believe in 4 days it will all over, well the presents opened and the kids begging to open up all the boxes so they can play with said toys. Christmas dinner will be cooking and hopefully we'll be able to relax and enjoy! This year has flown by and soon it'll be the New Year.

I am done shopping for the kids and hubby but still have a few more gifts I need to buy and soon! I am dreading going to the store, I know it'll be insanely busy. I have went the last two weekends and it's not been bad.... but we now in the week of Christmas. Hubby and I bought each other new cell phones, Blackberry Curves. They were on sale at Best Buy and he knew I had been wanting one for almost a year now. I love it, it's violet and pretty! He's pretty in love with his too. :)

I love the holiday season, getting Christmas cards in the mail and sometimes the kids get unexpected gifts, like today. I have a dear friend, and she knows who she is, who sent my girls a package for Christmas. They opened it today when J got home and they are so excited to read about your home state. :) It brought some tears to my eyes, because I miss you bunches and because across the miles you are wonderful to us all. Thank you for brightening their day! Loved the Christmas card too. :)

Family will be arriving on Wednesday, to say we are excited is not enough lol. The girls can't wait to see their Nana, Papa and Aunt L. It's been a year and half, since we were in Hawaii, so it'll be a nice visit . Also, as long as things go well and as planned my mom will be back in the mainland by March. Super excited about that, she'll be here for the baby to be born!

On the baby front, I seem to be feeling better most days. Still having a few issues in the evening but not nearly as bad as before. Our big ultrasound is scheduled for the 29th of this month. I am ready... but nervous as well. Just praying that everything is good with the little bean!

Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays to all!

14 days and counting

2009-12-15T15:56:00.000-06:00

Until the "big" ultrasound....that's right two weeks from today, hopefully we'll know that we are having a healthy boy or girl. It doesn't seem possible I am 18 weeks pregnant and almost halfway there. As much as I hate to admit it, I have not really enjoyed this pregnancy thus far. There has been alot of issues off and on, being sick the entire time, and dead tired, not exactly the picture perfect final pregnancy I was hoping for.

In most recent news, I came down with a stomach bug, that lasted 12 hours last Thursday. Oh I was soo very sick, and could not keep anything down. Hubby was worried so he called the dr and they sent me straight to labor & delivery. I was very dehydrated, so much they had trouble finding a vein to give me the IV. After several unsuccessful attempts they finally got it in, my arm is now bruised in several places and it hurts. My dr decided I needed to stay overnight, so I was admitted. Not exactly what I was hoping for, but I know it was for the best. Thankfully once I was admitted I no longer was sick, but wasn't allowed anything but ice chips that night and clear liquids the next morning. I was able to progress to jello and soup by mid morning and finally a real lunch and was released around 3.

The rest of the weekend I spent at home trying to recoup and feel better for work this week. I did manage to get a little Christmas shopping done on Sunday, but was exhausted and not feeling well by the time we were done. I am 95% done shopping, just need to get the stockings done for the girls and buy something for some family members. However I still need to wrap it ALL. Well I have 10 days left lol :)

Not much else is going on, just getting ready for the holiday and the last 2 days of work. Then I will be off for two weeks and enjoy some family time. Thankfully when I return to work in Jan, I will only be working two days a week. I am looking forward to it!

Winter Wonderland

2009-12-07T17:05:00.000-06:00

Well not exactly but close enough! We had our first "snow day" of the season, I know in Alabama!! I even took pics to prove it did happen! :) See below!

Isn't it pretty? We got approximately half an inch and some areas got a whole one lol. Ok moving on, now that we have established it DOES snow in Alabama. :)

I went to the dr last Monday for my 16 week check up, and I can't believe how the time is flying by. They were a little concerned I was a bit dehydrated and I just knew I would end up at L&D getting fluids, but bless their hearts, I got to stay home. I just had to drink alot of water and rest, so I have been.

They scheduled my next appointment and my ultrasound appointment! WOOT, I go back Dec 28 & Dec 29- U/S appt. So excited, and hopefully we'll find out what this little bean is! I was only slightly disappointed it wasn't before Christmas, since I was hoping to tell my family while there were here.

So my dad has guessed what gender everyone is going to have and so far he's been right on all accounts...scary eh! So I asked him what his prediction was, he said " I would like for you to have a little boy now, but I think it's a girl". So we'll see if he's on a winning streak lol.

No other news to report, just waiting to drop down some days at work, so I can relax more and get caught up on stuff. I could vent about the bank that we had to deal with but I am not going to bother, it'll just make me mad again!

Until next time...

Thanksgiving Weekend

2009-11-28T07:47:00.000-06:00

Wishing you a Happy Belated Thanksgiving!

We had a wonderful Thanksgiving here at home, the four of us plus my dad and my father in law. Surprisingly it went off without a hitch! Had alot of yummy foods, made my first sweet potato casserole, it was not to bad. The girls had a nice time visiting with their two grandpas. Today we are heading over to my sister in laws for our next turkey dinner, ummm can we say turkey overload?! Though I think they will have ham too, so maybe I'll have some of that instead....oh who am I am kidding, I love turkey.

I just can't believe we are already at the end of November and Christmas will be here in less than a month. A month? um hello, I have way to much shopping and prep work to do for that to happen! The good thing about it though is my mom, sister and stepdad will be here for Christmas. So excited, it's been a year and half since we last saw in them in Hawaii. It'll be nice to spend the holiday with them.

Baby update, things seem to be going ok at this point. Morning sickness still comes and goes, which has worn out its welcome, but I am surviving. I'll be 16 weeks on Monday, and go back to the dr then. I am hoping they will schedule my 20 week appt and ultrasound as well, and just maybe we'll be able to find out what gender this little bean is. :) Though knowing our luck in the past, they will not be able to tell.....ugh. I thought it would be a nice Christmas surprise to tell our families, so we'll see. Just about everyone knows now I am pregnant, though I still have a few friends who do not know, because I haven't seen them yet.

On the work front, it's going ok. I am getting more and more tired already...I thought the second trimester was the energy one??? I am missing that lol. I did tell them though I wanted to drop to two days a week as soon as possible. I am so behind on things I really need to cut back so I can get caught up, both playgroup and girl scout wise.

Not much else to report here, just busy getting ready for Christmas already. The tree is up and decorated as well as the stockings and a few indoor decorations. I want to do some outside stuff, but we'll see if I can get hubby to agree!

Get Over it Already!

2009-11-16T15:19:00.000-06:00

Let me start by staying this is a vent and if you don't want to read it, then skip it.

Get Over It! That's what I want to say to some people right now. Point blank, I am busy, I am tired, I am pregnant and can't get to every single thing YOU want me to do right when YOU want it done. I wait on people ALL the time to do stuff and hope it gets done, but the one time I am not ready, everyone wants to have a conniption fit. Get OVER it already. It'll get done, but in case anyone forgets, I work Mon-Fri, and not able to get online until after 3pm if then and sometimes not until after dinner and still have to help with homework, do Girl Scout stuff and try to figure out dinner as well, give me a break OK?!

I have a zillion emails I need to answer, girl scout meetings to plan, try to attend an event once a month, get ready for visitors for Thanksgiving and there just isn't enough time. I need to get Christmas lists together for family who is asking about things for the girls, I need to start Christmas shopping for the girls, and well there is a ton of other things I need to do but they'll have to wait.

Since I started working, my 'friendships' have become non existent, and I feel pretty out of the loop and often left out. I thought I would be in control when I started working but I have fallen down on so many levels. I rarely see my friends and when I do, I don't feel connected to them anymore. Sigh, table for pity party of 1 please.

On a brighter note, dh and I went on a date night this past Friday night. We went to the Melting Pot for dinner and it was devine. We skipped the main course, had cheese fondue, salad and dessert and it was the perfect amount of food. I can't wait to go back! We did manage to get a little Christmas shopping done for the girls but came home a littler early because I was so tired. Saturday we all went up to Monte Sano for a picnic and playtime, the weather has been gorgeous, so we took advantage of it.

Vent over and now I hope the rest of my day doesn't drive me insane.

November Rain

2009-11-05T15:36:00.000-06:00

Well not really.....yet. However I am sure the rain is coming soon enough, because the weeks and weeks of rain we had was not enough. I was beginning to think we had relocated to Seattle. :)

October has come and gone and it went by pretty fast, though for the most part I was sick and not feeling well. I managed to work as much as I could but still am not sure what I am going to do as far as staying or dropping down some days. I am so exhausted now, even at 12 weeks, I just don't know that I can continue working 5 days, keep up with meetup (which I am way behind on) and continue doing Girl Scouts as well. I need some sanity and it doesn't seem to be anywhere.

The girls had a good Halloween, J was a vampiress and H a cute witch. Our neighborhood doesn't seem to do the candy thing, maybe the lack of kids, so we went to one down the street. We only went on the outer road around it and it took 2 hours and they came back with loaded bags of candy! Needless to say they were excited. We tried to go downtown earlier in the day for some event that was "supposed" to be fun, but we were not impressed and left after about 10 mins. It took longer to get there and back than they had stuff to do. Two thumbs down from us.

This past Monday I had my 12 week checkup at the doctor. I had been worried since the couple weeks before when I had to go to L&D and be put on bedrest for a week. However the dr was able to find the heartbeat, it was around 155. She also is putting me on some blood pressure pills since it seems to be high every time I go in. Sigh, I need to find a new family dr too, but our insurance changes in Jan, so I am worried about finding one. I go back in 4 weeks, I'll be at 16 weeks then, and then in another 4, I'll be able to get my next "big" ultrasound! :)

Other than that I have just been battling a head cold for about a week now. Having issues sleeping since I can't breathe well and even during the day hasn't been great. I have been going to bed at 9 pretty much every night this week, which has helped but I hate going to bed so early, because that is the time I use to get caught up. What's another week, when you are already 2 weeks behind anyway?

Overdue for an update

2009-10-21T09:30:00.000-05:00

Sometimes I do not realize how long it's been since I have last posted and then other times I am just to lazy lol but that doesn't help my few readers I do have. :) So this post will be updates a plenty because last time I posted was over a month ago, eek!

Where do I start? Do I tell you how work is doing, school, Girl Scouts or the fact I am a little over 10 weeks pregnant? As you read that sentence, I can hear you saying duh lol so we'll start with the pregnant thing. ;) Baby #3 is on the way, edd is May 18 a few days after my 33rd birthday should we make it that far. This was kinda a surprise, not a surprise as in we haven't been TTC, but as in it's been over a year and half of trying and after a miscarriage in Feb, just surprised it finally happened. We found out early in Sept (right after I started working) and it's been a couple issues here and there since morning sickness has been kicking my butt in the first 8 weeks. Then on top of that I have had some spotting issues and landed at the L&D floor last Thurs. night for 5 hours. Thankfully everything seemed OK and the baby's heartbeat was around 180. My next appointment isn't until Nov 2, so I really don't have anything else to add, except keep us in your thoughts and prayers for a healthy 9 months. :)

Work is going OK, but I am in a bind on trying to figure out what to do. I have missed quite a few days to being so sick, and then my Dr put me on modified bed rest this week so no work. I really don't know how much longer I can do it, I am so tired all the time, it's hard for me to get up and moving at 6 am right now and plus the spotting issues. I am trying to figure out if I will just drop to a few days a week or quit...I really need to decide so I can let them know. DH is supportive either way, which is great, but also makes the decision harder to make. Thoughts?

The girls are still doing well with school. J is in drama club, she had "auditions" Tues. this week, so we'll find out in a couple weeks what part she got. I hope she enjoys it, whatever it ends up being. H loves her teacher and going to school and she's learning so much, I am glad we decided to put her into a MDO program. She misses her playgroup friends (as I do too) but overall the adjustment has gone well.

Life is busy as normal, we are gearing up for our annual group Halloween party, it should be fun. It's alot of work for us organizers but the end result is always awesome and the kids love it. We haven't made it to the pumpkin patch this yr, yet.... I am still hoping to fit a trip in before Halloween, somehow. I think we'll go one afternoon, since it's a little cheaper then. The girls have both chosen something different for Halloween costumes this year, kind of surprised about that. Normally they want to be girly, princess type things but this year H is going to be a witch (cute) and J a vampiress. I'll be sure to post pictures soon.

So that's us in a nutshell for now, will try to do better about posting!

Updates a plenty

2009-09-17T19:38:00.000-05:00

Well I am finishing up my first 2 weeks of work, and all is going well. It's a really easy job, sometimes busy and sometimes not. Everyone is super nice and helpful and H loves going to school everyday. I sure hope that continues next yr into Kindergarten!

Though I am glad to have a job, I am sure missing all my mom friends and playdates! I really need to start going to some more moms night outs, so I can still be connected to everyone. I haven't been to anything in over 15 days! I need to schedule a dinner out soon and a craft night at my house.

I am now trying to prepare for Girl Scouts, we had our parent meeting today. Everyone showed up and we got all the paperwork filled out and in two weeks the girls will be meeting for the first time. We have alot to cover so hopefully they all are able to come. J was excited to see some of her friends today, she didn't know they were coming over hehe, I like surprises! I am looking forward to a fun year with them and hope they love it and learn as well.

We are in the process of trying to get estimates on our roof, it has hail damage from all the storms that came in early this spring. So far we have had 2 including the insurance adjuster, so we want to get a couple more and go from here....but are having a hard time getting people to call back. I am sure they are busy too, since there is alot of people getting new roofs. I just want mine done sooner than later when even more rain comes.

In other news we need a new a/c unit :( Ours is about on its last leg lol, it keeps freezing up and not working properly. I am sure it needs some freon but that will not fix the issue. I am hoping once tax time comes we can get this done, I hate to wait until then but the money is tied up until then. If it's not one thing going wrong it's another!

Back to Work!

2009-09-04T18:50:00.000-05:00

Finally a job offer! Picture me doing the happy dance. :)

I have mentioned in a couple of posts that I have been looking for a part time or full time job depending on the pay and finally got an offer today on what seems to be the "perfect job". It's at H's school, Mon-Fri 8:30 to 1:30, all the same holidays/days off as the school J goes to. You know what is even better?? H gets to go full time for FREE and I still get paid! Oh yah, that's what I am talking about!

If all goes as planned I will start the Tues after Labor Day, least that is the plan. The only thing that could throw a wrench in this plan is the flu. J come down with a fever yesterday morning which hasn't let up and overall pretty miserable, sore throat, coughing etc. So off to the ped office we went, and she tested positive for the flu. Now we don't know if its the "regular" flu or the "swine" aka "H1N1" flu since they aren't subtyping it but they are treating it the same, tamiflu it is. I feel really bad for her, she's been laying around for 2 days now and doesn't seem to be feeling any better. I hope after a few days of meds she will be on the road to recovery.

H is adjusting well to school, she loves going and is excited about going everyday like big sister. This makes the job transition even better and it'll probably help that she'll likely see me a couple times through out the day. We are working on eating better for lunch time, some days she does ok and others not so much. Baby steps.

J seems to be enjoying school as well, and is excited about starting back to Girl Scouts in Oct. I am the Junior Scout leader for her troop. On top of that I have been asked to be the Troop Organizer for Providence School. Hmm I may just be a glutton for punishment. My current "jobs" : HMMT Organizer, NJM Asst Organizer, Troop Leader, Troop Organizer, Mom, Wife and yes soon to be Program Aide part time. If you never hear from me again, you'll know why!

I'll check in soon with updates on how work and Girl Scouts are going :)

School, Jobs & Life

2009-08-21T10:48:00.000-05:00

School is underway for the girls, so far so good. Hailey likes her teacher and school and loves to come home and tell me what they did for the day. Since starting school though she has been much more loveable and cuddly and tells me she wants to stay with me forever. Awww, sweet, really, but we both know that can not happen. In fact I don't know what she'll do if I do go back to work full time since she would have to be in some type of care full time. This is the part that kills me about working full time. She only has 1 more year left at home and I was really hoping to enjoy it with her before she goes off to Kindergarten.

Jess is still doing well, no complaints as of yet. She doesn't seem to be having trouble with homework yet and she likes her teacher. She is going to be a Junior Scout this year and somehow I have roped myself into being a troop leader for her. Hmm what was I thinking? I do have two moms who have agreed to be asst. leaders so that will help but I worry about the time commitment, especially if I go to work. It'll work out somehow, but probably not the way I want it too.

In the last few weeks I have probably applied to 30 jobs or so and am continually looking online to see what I can find. I need to go up to Gymboree and turn in an application there. I have a friend that works there and I believe they are hiring. Maybe I'll go up there later today or Sat morning. I applied for a job at Regions Bank, as a full time teller. I took the assessment test at the main office and passed. I am not just waiting to hear back, they of course are doing a background/credit check. I wish I knew a timeline they might contact me back so I would have an idea one way or the other, but I do not.

I really do not want to work, but we really need to get caught up on bills and put some into savings. I like being home and able to volunteer and do things with the kids, like help at school, do Girl Scouts etc. I guess only time will tell how this is going to work out.

School Days

2009-08-11T19:08:00.000-05:00

School began this week and boy were the girls ready, unfortunately Hailey couldn't go today because she has a cold. Sigh. Really? After all this time I have been waiting for some FREE time and it's a no go?! She will be better Thursday, she will. Do you hear me? She did go for a short while Monday for orientation and meet her teacher, so that was good. So far Jess is loving school, she did have homework today, but only gets it 3 times a week.

I am still looking for a job but have decided maybe just a part time night job would be better. I applied to Target today, for cashier/sales floor so maybe I'll get a call soon. In the mean time I am trying to start up my Usborne Books business. I bought a catchy domain name today, http://www.EarnFreeBooks.com which totally surprised me it wasn't already taken! I am hoping to get $115 in retail sales in my 1st 12 weeks, that is my beginning and only quota to make as a consultant. So basically I need to find 11 people to buy a book! Are you interested? Over 80% of their books are $10 or less! Hold a party and earn FREE books!

Other news, I have decided to become a Girl Scout Troop Leader, for Jessica's troop specifically. Her previous leader has moved on since her children are at different schools. I am meeting on Thurs morning with the area manager and going over things. Then it's off to plan a billion things for this yr! I hope this weekend I can brainstorm and come up with some great ideas.

The Month of Change

2009-08-05T23:27:00.000-05:00

I have decided this is the month of change for me. Things have been kinda of crazy around here, me overstressed about our budget, thanks to my new car. I needed the car but of course here it is back to school time, both girls need clothes and of course Christmas is around the corner. So the conclusion... I need to go to work. Atleast for awhile until we get caught up on things and put some money in savings. We are going to likely need a new roof, pretty much everyone in our neighborhood is getting one from the hail damage, so we have to come up with the deductible money. Sigh, school lunches, school clothes, school tuition, and of course Christmas.

I have applied to a bunch of jobs in the last week and have an "assessment test" at Regions Bank on the 18th of this month, hopefully it'll go well. Atleast that would be day time hours and no weekends and they usually pay pretty well. The downfall, having to find Hailey full time care....not really thrilled about that. She is going to 2 days a week MMO this fall but I would have to figure out something for the rest of the time.. I thought maybe I could find someone in the group who wanted to earn extra money. Guess we'll cross that bridge when we get there.

Another change, I was trying to decide whether to reactivate my Tupperware business or let it go.... ultimately I chose to let it go. I love the products and company but right now I can't have a business where I have to meet minimums. So I have been looking at other companies and have signed up with Usborne Books & More. I have a one time minimum to meet in my 1st 12 weeks, $115 in retail, and nothing else after that unless I become a supervisor. Those of you reading, help a girl out, go visit and buy a book or two to help me meet my goal! :) While you are there be sure to enter into the drawing for $50 in FREE BOOKS!

I am excited about this company, as I love books and so do my kids. Now I can build their library, earn money and get a discount, how great is that! I hope to do a few home shows here and there and then work my way into schools/preschools around here doing fundraisers and more. It's really a great program available for them and I would love to introduce it to the schools around here.

Jessica had a wonderful 9th birthday! We did a small family thing and she enjoyed going bowling and to dinner. She loved all her presents, which was mostly HSM stuff, room decor, toys etc. She is also excited to be going back to school next Monday. We go tomorrow to meet her teacher and turn in school supplies. I know I'll miss her but she is ready for the routine again and truthfully so am I. Hailey also goes in starting Tuesday and we go see her class and meet her teacher on Monday morning.

Don't forget to go check out my website and enter to win free books and book a party too!

Almost Birthday Time

2009-07-28T19:15:00.000-05:00

It's almost Jessica's 9th birthday! Wow, talk about feeling old now lol seems like just yesterday she was just learning to walk. I feel kinda like an awful mom right now, I was sick last week with headache after headache and didn't realize her birthday was this upcoming weekend. I thought I still had atleast 2 weeks left, umm wow I was wrong! She really wanted to have a sleep over for her birthday with some friends from school and brownies, but oops, not enough time for that now. So instead she asked to go bowling and to dinner, so that is what we'll do as a family. I wanted to take her to the cool new place, The Station, but it's $6 a game plus $4 shoe rental, um hello! I think we'll go to Madison Bowling Center, it's half the cost and maybe will not be as busy. One can hope anyways.

Last weekend we went school supply shopping, and even though it was quite a list I only spent $32 on Jessica's stuff. Not bad! I did buy Hailey a book bag and a lunch bag to match, I am guessing that is all she'll need. Walmart school supply section sucks this year, they didn't have much of anything and it was spread out all over the store? Why? Why is there pallets of paper in the craft/fabric section?

We're wrapping up the last few days of summer, getting in as many playdates as we can and spending time together. We have orientations next week and then school the following week, yay! Though Hailey may not get to start on time if we can't get her, her 4 yr old shots. They put us on a wait list, maybe we'll get called before school starts....but I am not holding my breath.

I am still hoping to hear back from the job I applied for sometime this week, could really use the money soon. I am looking at other options as well, but really don't want to go full time, but I guess if I find the "right" job I would. Keeping my fingers crossed I hear back from the one I want right now!

Back to School - 20 Days & Counting

2009-07-21T18:54:00.000-05:00

I can't believe school is only 20 days away! Jess is going into 4th grade this year, oh my, where did my little girl go? Hailey will be starting moms day out two days a week for four hours each day. That is really bittersweet, wasn't she just born yesterday? Sigh, guess not lol but it sure feels like it.

I am still waiting on the school to publish the supply list for this year, they have last years up still... um hello 20 days away, lets update already! I know they are busy, but come on, this is just a little important. I need to run up to Walmart I guess and see if they have the lists out yet as they have in the past. I really hope to not spend more than $50 but I guess it'll depend on what is left at the store by the time I get to shop. Luckily for Hailey I only need to have her a small backpack and lunch bag :) She is soo excited about going to school this fall, just like Jessica.

I am thrilled that I will get a few hours to myself two times a week, I am not sure what I'll do lol but can't wait! I have been trying to find some ways to make money at home yet again, other than a home business. Luckily I was able to find a work at home job, but its a temp contract, Sept thru Dec, but it'll come in handy for Christmas shopping. I have applied for a local part time job, I hope to hear something back this week. It would be perfect, the hours and pay is just what I need right now.

On the weight loss front, I did manage to lose one more pound this past week, whooohooo! I am down officially now 10lbs, very happy about that. I still have a long ways to go but it's nice to see the number steadily dropping on Monday mornings. Still trying to motivate myself to get some exercise though, one day I swear it will happen! Oh hubby has lost a total of 12lbs since he started the lower fat and portion controls with me :) I am proud of us both!

We're off to the Dentist, the wonderful Dentist of....

2009-07-15T11:37:00.000-05:00

Madison LOL. :) Jess is going back to the dentist today for 2 cavities to be filled they are very small and they only noticed them on the x-rays, so that's good. Last week we went in because she had been complaining about a tooth and her gum hurting her and she had this little tag of skin hanging down, looked as if it had bled some. I think because she kept messing with it. Either way they didn't seem overly concerned since the tooth itself was fine, and it doesn't look to be abscessed. Good news! However they are keeping an eye on it and we go into today they'll recheck it to see if they need to take it off.

The doctor mentioned something about not numbing her when they do the fillings.....eek! I said she has a low tolerance for pain, she'll likely need to be numbed. I don't want her to be afraid of going back in life. They also mentioned she'll probably get braces at 12, she's got some issues with crowding already with the permanent teeth that have come in. Fun times, can't wait... um right.

Hailey's teeth looked great, on the x-ray it did show one of her perm teeth coming in a little crooked on the bottom, but he said it could straighten out. Fingers crossed! They just opened their new office not to long ago, it's pretty nice. They have an indoor play area, like at food places, some big screen tv's, video games etc. Kids love going just for that LOL

On the weight loss front, I am down another 3.5lbs, for a total of 9lbs now. :) I am proud of that, and hope it continues. I talked to my mom yesterday, she may be having surgery for some bone spurs in her feet. She has an appt with the foot dr today. So I'll know more soon. Other news though, is she has some places on her hands, that is looking very much like the skin cancer she had on her foot last year about this time. They are going to do a biopsy on Aug 4 to find out if it is skin cancer. I am really worried about her, she's over in HI alone right now and has no support. :( This is all weighing in heavily on my heart right now. Prayers needed.