Not Good Enough?

Ever feel like no matter how much you try or do for others it is just not good enough?  I've felt this way off and on probably all my life but lately the part about doing things for others is getting to me. A LOT.  I am tired of feeling this way.  I try really hard to do things for myself, my family, friends and in general other people but yet feel unappreciated most of the time. Like what I did do for them, was just not good enough.  I hate feeling like that.  I hate that people can make me feel like that.  The question is how do I change it?  I obviously can not change their opinions (or what I think is their opinions) but I can change my way of thinking.  That goes back to my how question, so how do you handle that?

I imagine most of us feel this way at some point or another in our lives. I just think it's time for a change and need to focus on me.  Why do we care what others think so much? Is it ingrained in our minds as we're growing up, that if we can't do something "right", we are going to disappoint our parents, family and/or friends? I try really hard to not do that to my kids, but I am sure I've slipped. I am not perfect.  I just want my kids to grow up and know they tried and it's OK if they didn't do something perfect or the way someone else wanted it. 

I guess it's time for some soul searching to see if I can figure out how to not let myself get down when I think others are looking down on me or my actions.  If you have any suggestions I am all ears... well eyes ;)

The Month of Change

I have decided this is the month of change for me. Things have been kinda of crazy around here, me overstressed about our budget, thanks to my new car. I needed the car but of course here it is back to school time, both girls need clothes and of course Christmas is around the corner. So the conclusion... I need to go to work. Atleast for awhile until we get caught up on things and put some money in savings. We are going to likely need a new roof, pretty much everyone in our neighborhood is getting one from the hail damage, so we have to come up with the deductible money. Sigh, school lunches, school clothes, school tuition, and of course Christmas.

I have applied to a bunch of jobs in the last week and have an "assessment test" at Regions Bank on the 18th of this month, hopefully it'll go well. Atleast that would be day time hours and no weekends and they usually pay pretty well. The downfall, having to find Hailey full time care....not really thrilled about that. She is going to 2 days a week MMO this fall but I would have to figure out something for the rest of the time.. I thought maybe I could find someone in the group who wanted to earn extra money. Guess we'll cross that bridge when we get there.

Another change, I was trying to decide whether to reactivate my Tupperware business or let it go.... ultimately I chose to let it go. I love the products and company but right now I can't have a business where I have to meet minimums. So I have been looking at other companies and have signed up with Usborne Books & More. I have a one time minimum to meet in my 1st 12 weeks, $115 in retail, and nothing else after that unless I become a supervisor. Those of you reading, help a girl out, go visit and buy a book or two to help me meet my goal! :) While you are there be sure to enter into the drawing for $50 in FREE BOOKS!

I am excited about this company, as I love books and so do my kids. Now I can build their library, earn money and get a discount, how great is that! I hope to do a few home shows here and there and then work my way into schools/preschools around here doing fundraisers and more. It's really a great program available for them and I would love to introduce it to the schools around here.

Jessica had a wonderful 9th birthday! We did a small family thing and she enjoyed going bowling and to dinner. She loved all her presents, which was mostly HSM stuff, room decor, toys etc. She is also excited to be going back to school next Monday. We go tomorrow to meet her teacher and turn in school supplies. I know I'll miss her but she is ready for the routine again and truthfully so am I. Hailey also goes in starting Tuesday and we go see her class and meet her teacher on Monday morning.

Don't forget to go check out my website and enter to win free books and book a party too!